Please help me to correct my essay. Thank you so much! TOPIC: In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centers or malls to do their shopping. Is this a positive or a negative development? A multitude of local stores has recently closed as the result of the increasing number of high-rise and modern shopping malls which changes their customer shopping behavior. I believe this development is benificial because it helps to reduce city sprawl and create a viable solution to control store owners. On the one hand, the vertical development can prevent the city expansion and save the countryside. There are more spaces available to build new houses and other facilities, given that separate local shops are gathered into one large building. Therefore, using the green line land to deal with the problem of lacking spaces, such as the housing crisis, is evitable. For example, according to a recent survey, the housing price in China is more stable since the government encouraged all local sellers to move into shopping malls. On the other hand, centralization is the best way to control, because the shop owners have to follow the building rules such as an opening and closing time, the condition of the store and the type of products allowed to sell. This will minimize the problem of fraudulent products and charges, which might happen in local shops, and increase the quality of customer experience. For instance, Vietnam has reduced the number of reports about fraud products by half since its attempt to centralize all the local seller into one shopping center. In conclusion, although many small local stores are forcing to close because of the change in customers shopping direction toward shopping centers and malls, I believe this is a positive change since it could prevent the urbanization and help governments control the quality of products selling in those stores.

Please help me to correct my essay. Thank you so much! TOPIC: In many places, new homes are needed, but the only space available for building them is in the countryside. Some people believe it is more important to protect the countryside and not building new homes there. What is your opinion about this? Across the globe, some people argue that rural areas should be used for new homes when in need, while others think it should be conserved. This essay believes that countryside spaces should be protected because creating new accommodation in those areas can harm wild animals and deteriorate the environment. On the one hand, building new houses and facilities for human beings in rural areas can put many species in the danger of extinction. That is to say that this activity, per se, takes away a multitude of homes and living spaces of wild animals which were already forced to flee to those areas when the cities were built. As a result, those living things have no place to go and end up dying given that the new homes for humankind take place in their current living environment. The case of pandas is one of the typical examples of how urbanization impacts other animals’ lives. On the other hand, expanding human living areas due to overpopulation can make current environmental problems, such as the global warming issue, worse. Because people need to deforest to build new communities, and conduct other supporting activities like farming or producing consuming products which creates much more carbon emissions to the Earth. For instance, China has currently faced serious air pollution since they started to urbanize small villages and wild areas in 1991 to deal with their population problem. In conclusion, countryside and wild areas should be conserved to protect wild animals from extinction and minimize the environmental impact of human activities to the Earth.

A Writing attempt - Apr 21 Topic: Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Other says that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Some argue that kids should be encouraged by adults to join in organized group activities in their spare time rather than spending that time by themselves. Although the interaction with others helps children improve their social skills, I believe learning to occupy themselves on their own can enhance their self-awareness which is vital for their development. Children who are motivated to use their free time in working or playing with other people have, generally, fewer problems with social skills. Because group activities such as charity works or sports offer young generation a chance to communicate with various groups of people, from ages to backgrounds, which not only helps them to improve their communication skills but also teaches them how to build a relationship. For example, according to a recent survey in Canada, kids taking part in a sports club after school have a higher skill in terms of communication compared with those who spend time alone at home. However, it is not the only way to improve the social skill set. In contrast, youngers who are given more time on their own have an ample opportunity to discover and understand about themselves. That is to say that by offering children a chance to manage their free time by their own, parents also give them a space to practise what they like to do, think about their actions and emotions which have both good and bad impacts on their life and understand why they have that kind of reactions or feelings. It is crucial for child development because being self-awareness is the best way for youngers to maximize their potential. In conclusion, encouraging children to play with others in their free time helps them improve their social skills, yet offering them some “me time” will develop their self-awareness which, I believe, is more important for the young generation.

Writing Practice Some say fashion can tell a lot about a person’s culture and personality. This essay utterly disagrees with this statement because it is subjective to judge a person through their choice of clothes and people is prone to wear the same all over the globe. On the one hand, it could be misleading by understanding a person’s character solely by their appearance. That is to say that someone’s taste of fashion is just a tiny part of his or her complex personality which requires a significant amount of time and effort to get familiar with. Moreover, if people only see others as the way they are wearing, they can have a wrong perception which can lead to unwanted results in building a relationship. For example, if someone met Steve Jobs for the first time, he could be misunderstood about his characteristic because he seldom wore formal clothes which suits to his position as a CEO. On the other hand, fashion nowadays is a global trend which drives people, especially millennials, to buy and wear the same styles. Therefore, to some extent, it breaks the traditional culture in fashion followers. For instance, when the world is crazy about crop-top, a type of a short T-shirt to show off the girls’ waists, the elderly in Asian countries such as Korea, Japan, and China are very concerned about the way their children or grandchildren wearing can lead them to sexual abuse because these fashion styles are barely accepted in the Eastern culture. In conclusion, it is hard to tell about a person’s culture or character through their clothes because this kind of judgment could end up being wrong and people are likely to wear the same clothes now.