The Breadwinner

An 11 year old girl, named Parvana, lives in Kabul, Afghanistan with her parents and three siblings. One day, Taliban soldiers burst into her house and captured her father (due to) because he had a foreign educational background. Her family went to the jail (and wanted) to persuade the police to release her father, but they were beaten for being outspoken. After that, her mother was depressed and (couldn’t move away on her mattress)-became bedridden.

Parvana has an older sister and two younger brothers. In Afghanistan, woman can’t go out without a male companion. Without (choice) any other options, Parvana had to cut her long, beautiful hair (and dressed)-to dress as a boy for going out and buying food. She also managed to make money to (bring)-buy bread for her family.

(He)-She had a business plan to open a “portable shop” by using trays to move their wares around. However, they didn’t have money to buy trays, and at last they figured out they could dig out the bones from the graveyard and make money for buying trays.

At the end of the story, Parvana made a friend named Shauzia, but soon they had to leave each other. The two girls (had)-made a deal that 20 years later they would meet in France at the top of Eiffel Tower.

We can’t (image)-imagine how hard it is for a young girl try to (bring)-buy bread for her family in a war-torn country! Life has been hard for many people there. Those of us who live in a peaceful country should cherish our life and take each day as a gift.

* Shannon - Nice work to report on those that have a most difficult life. We can appreciate ours more! Nice job writing, and just a few awkward verb phrases for the most part. - Jeff

Fitted Body

Those who have fit bodies, chiseled muscles,  and walk confidently are those who visit the gym frequently. For most of us, working hard in the gym is not pleasant work. We need to push ourselves hard and exercise with persistence. At the same time, we have to maintain a healthy diet and not indulge ourselves in the banquet meals too often. Eating delicious food is part of our nature for enjoyment in this world, so keeping a healthy diet needs strong self-discipline. Admiring those fit bodies, I could see their enduring hard work in the gym, as well as their well developed self-discipline. After all, a fit body is what most of us dream of attaining.

A survey from Harvard University shows most rich and well-educated people are fit and healthy. People who are wealthier tend to be fitter and healthier. For example, most of the CEOs from the world`s top 500 enterprises are fit. On the contrary, obesity occurs much more often among poor people. Rich people are not only rich with money; they are rich in mind, too. They have enough time and money to spend in the gym and buy healthier food. They also have better self-discipline. Poor people who are struggling to feed their mouth are more likely to buy cheap, unhealthy food, and they don’t have the conscious awareness or persistence to take care of their bodies by comparison.

If we want to be fit, it helps to make money and become as educated as possible. Becoming both wealthy and educated is a good balance with going to the gym. If we are struggling to put food on the table and have to keep three jobs to cover the bills, how could we have time and money for going to the gym?

Shannon, you have a sharp eye in viewing society! I enjoyed reading your essay. Jeff.

Love In Life

Real love is silent. They might never say I love you,
but they’ve done a lot for you.
They’ve given up everything for you.

It was a very rainy day.
On the street,
an old guy was pushing a cart and was desperately looking for a shelter.
A middle school boy saw him, took his umbrella and held it for him.
He didn’t mind that half of his body was wet in the rain.
The most beautiful thing was not the raining day.
It was the world under the umbrella.

An old, poor guy scratched an expensive car accidentally as he was taking an old trickle.
He was so worried that he didn’t have money for compensation.
The car owner got off and told him not to worry, as he wouldn’t ask for money.
The old man was so touched that he knelt down to say thank you.
The car owner walked quickly to him and helped him to stand up.
Decency is not about wealth.
Life is so hard, so we must treat each other better.

A dog owner had to go the post office.
He had no choice but tie his dog to a pole.
It was so cold, and the dog started to shake in the frozen winter.
A homeless guy passed by and saw the hopeless dog.
He went to the dog and took it,
warming him in his shabby clothes.
He was in exile,
but his heart was in heaven.
He looked dim,
but his heart was bright.

……..

This is an imperfect world. Sometimes it is so cold and hopeless.
At the same time, it is still beautiful. So......
remember those who had held an umbrella for you:
those who had sympathized with you;
those who had warmed you;
those who had made you laugh.
Those who took long journeys to meet you. 
………
Sometimes life doesn`t treats us as gently as we wish.
Being reminiscent of those past acts of love and mercy,
you would find your life worth living.

A Dying Species

The last male Northern White rhinoceros died yesterday. This species will probably become extinct on this planet because only two surviving Northern White female rhinoceros`s are left. They are the dead male rhinoceros’s daughter and granddaughter. It is possible that one could be inseminated with his DNA 

The dead rhinoceros’s name was Sudan. He was named after his country, and he was brought to Kenya from the Czech Republic. Since then, he started his quarantined life. He spent his last years with the security guard there. Sudan was 45 years old, and that was his dying age. His muscles deteriorated badly before his death, so he even couldn’t stand up. A veterinarian scientist euthanized him.

When Sudan was born, there were about 1000 rhinoceroses in the world. With the poor economic situation, the Africa government didn’t have enough money to take care of these animals to protect them from extinction, especially from poachers that value their white horns of ivory. Within these short 45 years, we are now facing a dying out of a species.


A statistic shows that one species dies out on earth every one hour. A magazine reports that after the next  50 years, there will be more than 1 million terrestrial animals and plants that will have disappeared on our planet. About 75% of the creatures on earth will be destroyed. If we don’t take it seriously, then the end of the world would come soon.

Shannon - I hope you like the edits I made on this and the one about reading books. Your articles are good and always have a good message. Try to keep an eye on your punctuation and the difference in usage of the comma and period. Thanks for the effort as writing is always so hard to do. Keep up the good work!

Why I Read As Many Books As Possible

The places you’ve traveled, the books you’ve read, and the people you’ve loved are all embedded in and an extension of our personality.

People who work out and those that don`t, you can’t tell the difference after one day; a month later, you might find a little bit of difference. Five or ten years later, you can see evident differences between them, no matter mentally or physically. The same is true with reading. With time passing by, you will recognize big differences between those who love reading and those who don`t read.

Some have said I’ve read lots of books, but I’ve forgotten most of them. What is the meaning for reading?

I would say when I was a kid, I ate lots of snacks, but I don’t remember what I had eaten. There is one thing that must be true - some of them have nourished my body.

Some may ask young girls what is the importance of reading so many books? The ultimate destiny for most of them is having an ordinary job, becoming a housewife, giving birth to children, taking care of her husband and even cooking similar meals.

I think after I have read many books, even I follow the ordinary woman’s path, I may do the same work but with a different mood; I may have a similar family as others, but my family would have a better atmosphere; I may have the same kids, but they would have different life quality……..

Reading lets me have a rich mind even though I don’t have a rich life.

I don’t want to say reading would make us extraordinary, but reading means we are not fully satisfied with the reality. We still recognize the possibility to improve our life or to have another life style.

I read so that I could make friends who have a similar mind as me, and to become an interesting person that loves to think about everything.

Hi Shannon. This is an interesting story that you wrote. I would like to edit it, but I will re-read it for the deeper meaning. ---Jeff

I Wish You Since Now a Life Time Happiness

All of my past days
I have been deeply captured by my own innocence
I hope that I could have the simplest life in the world
Although Life is very unfair
And it has never allowed me to live simply and easily
I insist on living my life in my own way
I have been working arduously with all my passion and love to try to change the people and what is happening around me
Someone told me
What I have done has already touched the heart of God
And I do think I have been moved by what I dedicate to life
But some of them have never felt
At last, I was compelled to give up, because I didn’t have other choices
What had happened the day before yesterday
It was like your presence
All happened by all of a sudden
I was completely overwhelmed and lost
Today’s me
In some people’s eyes
I might have lost some parts of my simplicity and innocence
I was once feared by the complicated relationships
I have no idea that I would have a complicated life
And I have no intention that I would complicate other’s life

The start in the hot spring
……..
What had happened two days ago
Against my life goal that I have always perused
Since then, I had been bewilder and anxious
I had been confused about ability to face the messy of our future
But I have received your appreciation today
All of my restlessness
Has disappeared
I wish you
Since now a life time happiness

Childish

A 16 year old girl named Yu from Guangdong, China is an entrepreneur. She established a company which has now earned 10,000,000 RMB as an innovative reward from the government.

A few days ago, Yu was interviewed by a TV show. She said that she could earn more than 1,000,000 RMB a year, but some adults are addicted by computer games and can only earn the same salary as ten years ago.

I am so ashamed. We adults have been existing in this world for so many years, but we haven’t achieved as much as a 16 year old young girl. I admire Yu’s courage and desire for entrepreneurship. Sometimes we might need to be as childish as a kid. A child, in general, has less anxieties and worries, so they have more courage than adults. Without fear, we may become more likely to do something adventurous.

Shannon, I like your article. I hope your project is just as successful as hers was above!

Happy Learning

My baby girl has gone to primary school for two weeks. last Weekend, her two teachers came to our apartment and visited our family. In the beginning, we were very excited. My baby girl practiced her GuZheng instrument for her two teachers, and she also cleaned up her stuff and put everything in order to impress them. We were expecting praise from her teachers.

On the contrast, we were very disappointed. The male teacher told us that my girl was ranked in the last three of her class. The reason for this is that she didn’t learn anything when the other kids were studying primary courses when they were at kindergarten.

There is a prevailing phenomenon here in China. It seems every kid wants to be the top student in their school. Their parents push very hard to help their babies to study so that they can survive well in the adult world.

Our girl didn’t learn the primary courses in the kindergarten, but she loves GuZheng and Taekondo. She learned them very well. All of her problems, in her teacher eyes, is our fault for the lacking of `primary school courses` learning.

Many moms are called tiger moms in China. Most of them have decent jobs. In order to take care of their kids’ study, they quit and become housewives. Here in Beijing, being a housewife is very popular. My baby’s teacher told me I need to take more time for my baby, but as a full-time working mother, I couldn’t.

The teacher gives lots of assignments to the students, and all of the homework needs the parents’ instructions. That means if we don’t have time to take care of my baby’s study, my girl will be left behind forever.

A country with a dense population - everyone could see the fierce competition. Everyone is nervous and strives hard to climb to the top rank of society. Do we really need to strive that hard, or even sacrifice our interests which make us happy? Maybe we could live better if we only learned things based on our interests and ignored some other part of the competition.