You did a good job with this!  Who are the pop singers who taught you so well?  Here are a few corrections:

 

Somehow testing my English!

Hi. I'm Titi from Iran. I began to learn English 8 years ago. I didn't go to any language institute or anything like this to learn English. I used song lyrics as my textbooks and pop bands as my teachers!
I think it's a little bit strange way to learn a foreign language, but I enjoyed it a lot and it completely worked for me! But Mmy school lessons helped me, too, but you know, school lessons are not very advanced.
Anyway, I think I've learned English well, but when I look at my vocabulary, uhh, I get disappointed :| I think I have a lack of vocabulary. When it comes to translation, from Persian to English, I get confused. And this makes me really angry :| I used some books like " 504 Essential words " to improve my vocabulary, but to be honest, with a few exceptions of some words, words don't stick in my mind. I don't know what to do!
( But I do the vice versa translation ( English to Persian ) well! :D I was a soccer forum's translator! )

And one other thing, I'm not really good in grammar. I write sentences confidently, but after just even one day, I reread them and I am disappointed in them. then, I get disappointed again :| 'cuz I find some childish mistakes. in my own made sentences! :| But when I read a note in English, I can understand that some parts are mistaken or wrong, but I really don't dare to correct it! It's because of a lack of 1. confidence ( somehow! ) 2. grammar knowledge. Sometimes I know it's wrong but I don't know the correct form! It makes me feel very bad :|

I decided to write this notebook entry to test my English, and I'll be so thankful if you read this and add a correction to my entry. :)
And I'll be so glad to hear any ideas for improving my grammar.
( I'm not really good with grammar books! They get boring quickly :| )

First notebook entry: Introducing myself

I am learning English , because it is an international language
My native language is farsi&balochi i also can speak in Urdu & Arabic
Im Web & graphic designer by profession but i love to know about anything
My hobbies are 1st talikng then walking after that is studing & swiming

Salam Arsalan:

 

I am learning English because it is an international language.  My native language is Farsi and Baluchi.  I also speak Urdu and Arabic.  I'm a Web andgraphic designer by profession, but I love knowing (or learning) about everything.  My favorite hobbies are talking and walking.  I also like to study and swim. 

Sarah, In terms of grammar, here are some small corrections: Children keep themselves away from others, so they ARE ostracized first by family and then by society. or Children set themselves aside from others, so they ARE ostracized first by family and then by society. I think the first sentence is probably best. We usually set things aside, but we don't often use that term to refer to people (although there's nothing wrong with using it in that way)

 

Hi Sedi.  What you have written is difficult for me to understand and the best way I can correct it is to rewrite it.  Here is what I think you are saying:

"As far as I am concerned, you will enjoy life and understand many more things if you study at the university level.  But you may also miss developing some life skills and some of the pleasures life has to offer by extending your studies because it may delay marriage and other experiences.  Am I right?"

 

Let me show you one part of your paragraph that is difficult to understand:

 

you will find many affection on your life e.g 

<em>In English we might say "I enjoy my life" or "I love my life" but we would not say "I feel affection for my life".</em>

I hope this helps a little bit.

 

Hi Sarah, Your sentence is very close to correct. Here is a corrected version: Women are required to work not only TO support their children financially, but also to fulfill their children'S material needs. Actually you were correct the first time in the use of 'material 'Materialistic' means a person values material possessions too much.

I agree with Michael that 'many' is a better and far more common choice than 'multitudinous'. There is an inconsistency in all of the sentences between the plural 'children' and singular 'citizen.' You should either say 'raise their children as productive citizens' or 'raise their child as a productive citizen'.

help with writing correction 2

The table provided illustrates data in percentage terms about various forms<em> (you might substitute 'types' for 'forms')</em> of households living below the poverty line in Australia in 1999.

On average, it can be seen from the table that just over a tenth of all households in Australia were living in poverty in 1999, which was a high figure for a developed country.

Looking more closely at the table, it is noticeable that 21% of sole parent families comprising 232,000 households were living in poverty, which is two times more than the households including couples with children. It is also worth noting that 19% of single people were living below the poverty line, which is the second highest figure. The proportions for couples without children and aged older <em>(or 'elderly')</em> couples coupled households living in poverty were insignificant relatively, including 7% and 4%, respectively.

Overall, the table suggests that families consisting of a sole parent and those who which include a single adult are more likely to be below the  line.

 

(I made a few minor changes, Morteza.  You can see that I suggest eliminating the references to the table because I think they're unnecessary. )