[ My Busan itinerary on Google Maps 93]

Would you mind correcting my essay? If you were me, how would
you go about writing it?
Which part should I describe with details  in detail? I hope my explanations are clear. I hope you can (can what?)

(Part Two)

I categorized the places under four categories:
(1) "Favorites" for a hotel or hostel that I may choose.
(2) "Want to go" for places that interest me.
(3) "Starred places" for the restaurants I want to visit or places where I can buy the food.
(4) "Done" for places I've already visited.

Marking them on the map this way help me I am able to visualize more clearly the locations and some nearby modes of transportation. (you need this context, otherwise the sentence doesn't seem to connect with any of your other thoughts)  Also, if I don't get to visit certain sights, I can check them out easily on my future trips  it will be easy to remember them for future trips. I could even use this map to share with someone else we can share these maps with someone.
It is a very satisfying for me. (This sentence is grammatically correct, it's just that in English we wouldn't use this phrase to describe this situation.)

So, planning it out this way feels very worthwhile.
Could you tell me pleasant experiences of your itinerary? (Again, not technically wrong, but not a natural sounding sentence)

Have you had a pleasant trip you could share?

Presentation script - Tesla coil- (Introduction and Background)

Hello. I'd like to talk about Nikola Tesla and his work to create the Tesla coil.

At a time when there was a big push to develop practical applications of electricity (this gets your meaning across, though I'm sure someone could come up with a more elegant way of saying it) When the practical application of electricity is thriving, two scientists were competing for the adoption of in confrontation (it's actually pretty hard to think of a good way to say these sentences, because they are pretty dense) with the transmission method they developed. They are were Thomas Alva Edison and Nicora Nikola Tesla.

Edison recommended direct current, but Tesla recommended exchange alternating current．

Today, exchange alternating current is more prevalent mainstream for power transmission method you know．So, next time I’ll talk about the Tesla coil, (<- added comma.  Needed because you combined two sentences here) which became the reason driving force behind the adoption of for recommending exchange alternating current．

-Wow, pretty advanced topic.  This is tough to correct because at this level you aren't just trying to get meaning across, but also say things elegantly and concisely.  So each person would have a different opinion on how they would word it.  Anyways, good work, very impressive, and keep up the hard work.

About Sewing

Hi. I am a Japanese man and I studied sewing about ten years ago. In Japan, we usually study sewing in both elementary and secondary school but many people gradually stop sewing gradually. ( can I use little by little instead of gradually?) In short, only my mom do does sewing in my family. I appriciate appreciate it. Anyways, also today, my man mom did some sewing (usually when you say "did verb-ing" you put "some" in between.)and asked me to pass the thread through the needle.  So so that I tried it and I succeeded it within 5 seconds despite it being a long time since I last sewed. How do you feel today about your needle threading skills?

{ English Diary } Do you know Have you heard of the book "500 SUSHI"?

One day Recently ("one day" is usually used when talking about something that happened a significant time ago, like maybe more than 6 months), I found the following book that title is a book called "500 SUSHI". I was surprised because I've never seen 500 types of sushi SUSHI. Do we have that many types of sushi? I can't think of that many don't remember.. mmm... Also, I it would be hard to imagine couldn't imagine.

What was happen the SUSHI...? (<-  I don't understand that sentence)"Stained Glass Window Futomaki" is beautiful, but I've never seen it, and I thought It isn't I don't think it's traditional Japanese traditional SUSHI sushi!!! Please, don't misunderstand.. don't get the wrong idea...(I don't understand why you say this)

National election

Prime minister Shinzo Abe dissolved the lower house and a national election is going to be held. The vote will take place on Sunday the 22nd.
Yuriko Koike, the governor of Tokyo, launched a political party, Kibou no Tou, for this election. They are going to participate in national politics as another conservative party. Not only that, but the largest opposition party, Minshin, also decided to join Koike's party.
It will be interesting to see how this election turns out, as it's still anybody's game.