Good morning from California Stella! Sorry you are feeling uncomfortable. I know how it is working two jobs and trying to save for your future while going to school. It is very tough but it sounds like you are a motivated individual and you have goals for yourself which is great! I think you will do great on your test if you make the time to study and practice more. It is difficult studying in your house with family members around but I try to study at a time when I know they're out, sleeping, or I'll go to a park or a friend's house if I can. I'm happy you get to take a nice trip to South Korea to unwind and I'm sure when you get back you will hit the books and get back on track with your dreams. Good luck! :)

Feeling uncomfortable..... :(

I'm feeling very very bad today.
I am not sick, just emotionally feeling bad because my home is very different from how I am now. 
I had dreams to immigrate to Australia after a few years and decided to stay in Japan as my first and last year of working and experiencing Japan in my life. To accomplish my dream, the first thing I should do is study more to get a high score on the IELTS test but I always end up watching TV instead of hitting the books. I actually do not want to watch TV while studying but I do not have my own room to focus on my studies and shut off the noise. Since I live in an apartment, when one of my family members turn on the TV, the sound distracts me and I generally watch TV and spend too much time on solving one question or reading the whole article. I know this is a really inefficient way to study... There is no public library near my home nor a cafe. I do not have a Japanese driving license so I am not allowed to drive away to find a place.
I have an English test this Sunday but I haven't reviewed that much. Hopefully I pass the exam and am qualified to take the next level examination. Time is running out....

I have struggled so much with my second job. I can't tell exactly what I want to do but I would like to have my own business no matter how small my business is, I really want to try to earn a profit with my idea. I have checked so many things on the internet but not all answers are on the internet. Of course I need funds at the beginning but I can't run out of my savings for now because I have a trip to South Korea next Monday. I am just going there to chill and eat tasty food and relieve stress. Since my savings is a very little amount I dont have enough money yet to spend on business.. I feel very uncomfortable being in this situation.....

Today my notebook is very negative but I am usually very optimistic.
Thank you for reading. I am sure that I will feel better when I wake up. Good night everyone or good morning to people who live on the opposite side of earth. Have a wonderful day.

Hi Gleb, I really enjoyed reading your notes and could not help but feel inspired with what you had to say. I totally agree with you and have been on both sides of the spectrum. I think people tend to get comfortable and lose sight of what is important. It struck a nerve when you mentioned people having goals. I think goals are very important to have and keeping sight of your goal can motivate you to do the unthinkable. I also agree with Doraemon and believe that change starts with ourselves, and we can make a great impact on the world by setting an example for others to aspire to. Thanks for making me think outside of the box. 

Stop think, just relax

As we know, only 5 percent of all people do something highly important for the humanity as a whole. Only these people discover the world, create new machines, etc. What do you think is the difference between other people and this small group of intellectuals?

You are completely right if you just thought about goals. They have goals and they always do something to come a bit closer to this goal.

And other people? Do we all have goals? Maybe yes, or no, who knows. But everyone should have a dream. If you haven't got a dream, you have no reason to wake up every day and live.

I look around and notice that too many people just live without any contemplations about their future. Adults and children, my classmates and unknown people to me. No dreams, no worry, no goals, no future.

Yes, I am an idealist, I hope people could change themselves and our world. But now I realize that without thinking we will never change.

What is wrong with us? Or is there something wrong with me?

Don't be sad Fang. Your English is very good. I corrected a few things in your notebook to make it flow a little more smoothly but you're doing great! Just keep at it and don't give up. :)

I want to learn English but it is difficult for me. I have no idea how to study English. I only remember the words I learned when I was in primary school. I don‘t even know how to have a good English name. I feel very sad.