FOREIGN LANGUAGE
It is known that all children should study a foreign language in school. Starting in the earliest grades plays a significant role in human life. The number of people who give importance to this subject has increased in recent years. I definitely agree with this idea.

First of all, young children learns more quickly. For example, children has asked very question so far grow (I don't understand this sentence) because they want to learn about everything around them. Therefore, learning a foreign language is easy for them compared to adults.

On the other hand, it is important to have a large culture. Because It gives children the chance to talk with other children. Thereby, they obtain information about tradition, costume and culture by meeting new friends. Moreover, this case is effective in the development of intelligence. The more information children obtain, the more they their brain folds increase. Namely, they have more intelligence.

Also, second languages / bilingualism / learning other languages can help children with their homework. For example, they can investigate homework from different source.

To summarize / in summary, if children learn foreign language in the earliest grades, they will have prepared well for becoming successful people in the future.

Good job!

foreign language

Write about the following topic:
All children should study a foreign language in school starting in the earliest grades.
To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your
answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
.......................................................................................................................

FOREİGN LANGUAGE
It is known that children should studying ( or who study ) a foreign language in school starting in the earliest grades plays a significant role in human life. The number of people who have given importance to this subject has increased in recent years. I definitely agree with the idea.

First of all, children learns more quickly in ( or during ) the early ages. For example, children has asked very a lot of questions so far grow. because they want to learn about everything around, and so they quickly advance in the language they are learning. Therefore, to learn a foreign language is easier for them compared to adults.

On the other hand, it is important to have a large culture. Because It gives the children a chance to talk chance another with other children around the world, thereby they obtaining information about other traditions, customs and cultures by meeting new friends. Moreover, this case is effective in the development of intelligence. The more children obtained information, the more their brain folds increase, Namely that is, they have gain more intelligence.

Another things, learning a second language can help them with contrubite their homework. For example, they can investigate their homework from different sources.

To summarize, if schools learn teach foreign languages in the earliest grades, its will prepare produce suscessful persons people in the for future .

gray = delete

red = corrections

blue = recommendations

Good job!

In recent years, many people has become conscious of the fact that studying a foreign language in earliest grades is likely to be of great benefit to the development of children. Thus, a large majority of parents are willing to spend expensive tuition fee for their children in order that they can be proficient in second language. In my point of view, I strongly agree with their decision. 

First of all, many studies show that children learns more quickly in early ages. It is clearly seen that children often ask adults many questions because they tend to be attractive in discovering and experiencing new things in daily life. Therefore, to learn foreign language is slightly straightforward for them compared to adults.

On the other hand, it is pivotal for them to learn different cultures. Because Since learning new language may provides them golden opportunity to communicate with foreign friends to obtain valuable information. For that reason, it could be beneficial to children's development as well as broadening their career path in the future.

You need to write an alternative conclusion :)

P/s: Overall, you did a good job. There are only some minor mistakes. I just tried to rewrite it in my style :)

I'm sorry. The first sentence should be:

It is known that studying a foreign language in school starting in the earliest grades plays a significant role in human life.

I also deleted the word "children".

Okay .. it should be good now, i hope. :)