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<em>unedited text with comments below to follow</em>

 

I am about to go to work!

Hello!__Nice to meet you.__I am a teacher,_and today I have to go to work.__Although I want to <em>have a rest</em>,_I must work today.

 

<em>Comments:  What do you teach?  The above text is more how I would say it, with the exception of "have a rest", which I am not sure how to exactly translate from Chinese because you guys seem to use 休息 for the opposite of work, and often translate it as "have a rest," but this isn't what a native speaker of English would say.  We would say things like:</em>

<em>- I wish I had today off.</em>

<em>- I wish I didn't have to work today.</em>

<em>- I don't want to go to work today!</em>

<em> </em>

<em>I used "wish" in the examples, which I know is also tricky for a lot of Chinese speakers because 希望 is used for both "wish" and "hope", so often it gets translated into the wrong one and consequently (perhaps) the two English words are misunderstood by Chinese speakers, so really briefly:</em>

<em>- "wish" is for when you don't have something--it sounds like it's for something that might not even happen, but you want it, but maybe it can't happen.</em>

<em>- "hope" sounds more like you expect it to happen, you want something and you think it can happen.</em>

<em> </em>

<em>I hope you find this all useful, and I wish you the best!</em>

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<em>comments</em>

 

<em>Obviously there is not anything seriously wrong with such a high level of writing.  Most of the suggestions are more stylistic ones that you would expect to see when native speakers have their compositions graded.  Even good writing that breaks no rules can be made a little better.  I hope you find these kinds of suggestions useful.</em>

 

English Writing  <em>Not the best title in the world ;)</em>

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This morning I chatted with a friend of mine in Detroit, who has been there for more than six years, about the work and life in the United States <em>(you might want to think about breaking this into two sentences--the length is long enough where you aren't sure where it's going for a long time)</em>. It seems that to find a job in the USA is not so easy for a foreigners <em>("foreigners" when used in the US to refer to people not from the US kind of takes on a negative, exclusionary tone--people usually twist around to use more neutral-sounding terms like immigrant or students from abroad, for example, rather than "foreigner")</em>. My friend told me that the US Government provides some tax preferential tax policies to encourage companies to enroll more US citizens. But On the other hand, those some one who have a jobs have to pay part of their income as tax to the government in order to help those guys who are laid off. When I was in Pennsylvania, I usually saw some guys who never went to work. They were just smoking and enjoying the fresh air all day and all night.

My friend also complained about the life in college. She told me that we could hardly write a composition in the same style as a native English native language speaker. I really agree with her. Maybe readers can understand what I am writting about, but the words and sentences could be more improved. To tell you the truth, I used to write a composition in Chinese at first, and then translate it into English sentence by sentence. Before completion, I would copy it into Google and let the auto-translator help to find out the misspellings and any other issues. So the composition would might still possibly be in Chinglish.

This is the reason why I would like to write here. Hope some English native English language speakers will help me to correct my composition and improve my written English.

By the way, I didn't use Google Translate on this composition.

 

<em>I haven't decided what the best way to give my suggestions is (colors, bold, what kinds of errors and comments to focus on), so any feedback about that is appreciated.  I think the changes I've suggested would make it sound more like a native speaker, but if you don't understand why I thought that, or see grammatical problems with what I've suggested, please let me know.  :)</em>

Some guys use it, like frat boys and grown up frat boys. And those speaking with a more hip-hop vernacular. A 1990's one. Actually, those are the same group, mostly. Come on bro, kick back and have a few brewskies. Ugh.

Some people use "backwards and forwards" a lot, and many people never use it. I think it sounds a little corny and old fashioned, like a 1950's person. "I know computers like the back of my hand!" "He knows computers inside and out!" But some people use one of these. Most don't. It just depends on their style.

First notebook entry:  Introducing myself

 

Hello, guys！ I am a sincere heart to communicate with your language, I am a Chinese teacher, with the patience to help you!  Most importantly, I can help you become a confident Chinese speaker!  Also, I hope that you help me improve my English.  We will work together to reach a consensus.

 

<em>I'm not sure what you mean by "reach a consensus" exactly, or "sincere heart."</em>  <em>Can you say these things some other ways?</em>

I don't want to be a shoe.  I want to be a purse.

Recently, I watched a TV series named <em>Friends</em>. In the episode 1, season 01, thing is that the bride Rachael called her daddy to explain why she ran away from the wedding.  Here are Rachael's words:

"When I sit in the gifts room, it seemed that every box said to me 'You are a shoe. You are a shoe!'  Why I am to be a shoe?  What about something else?  Maybe, I want to be a purse."

What I want to ask is that in this occasion, is there any special meaning by defining someone is a shoe or a purse.  In Chinese "broken shoe" (破鞋) has a special meaning inspecial occasion. For example, in this centence "She is a broken shoe" means "she lost her virginity", a derogatory term. "A walking wallet" usually means someone pays his gf's or wife's shopping bills.

Please help me correct my text and answer my question.

Best Regards/ Edan

 

<em>Ian, she doesn't mean anything special by her use of the specific words "purse" and "shoe."  She is just trying to explain her feeling in a strange and creative way.  She is being quirky because she doesn't know how else to say it.</em>

 

<em>She's using shopping terms because that's what was in front of her and that's her world.  If she were a mechanic, she would have said "Everywhere, everything is telling me I am a tire.  I'm a tire.  But maybe I don't have to be a tire.  Maybe I could be a muffler."</em>  <em>She just means that she feels like everything is telling her what she is, and she feels like she could still be something different.</em>