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Thai
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Chinese (Mandarin)Native
Zhuang
Chinese (Cantonese)
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  • Corrected

    下雨的时候。

    我不认识你,
    你也不认识我。
    一朵朵白云票在天上。(票应该用飘,而后面描写的是下雨天,不应该是白云而是乌云,逻辑问题) 
    下大雨,大地如同盖了(眼里)浸满了眼泪(运用拟人的修辞手法)。
    在这里,除了我们之外没有别人。
    我站着看你,没有人知道什么时候停止下雨会停下(原来的的表达也没错,但是后置会显得更加优美、文艺)。
    只有我一个人知道,
    此时此刻是最好的时候


    I don't know who you are
    You don't know who I am too.
    There were a lot of clouds in the sky
    Heavy rainfall like the ground covered by tear.
    You and me,there's no one else here.
    I stand here looking at you.
    No one knows when it stop raining
    Only me who know that this moment is the best time.

    0 voted
    August 6, 2016
    2