i wonder...i wander... today,i wonder why i was so frustrated.what the hell life i am living?food tasted bad i have to eat everyday though i dislike it so much.and would you like to live in a dormitory filled with six big boys where the air smells bad.everything there is scattered about in a mess.so you know,i live in a dirty nest,small,simple and crude. i wonder how there can be so many kinds of people and things,other things what are complex and difficult for me to understand.once i leave our room for classes,i find many strangers around me that won't know me forever,meanwhile i won't understand them as well.then,i begin wandering again in the college.have you ever had the feeling that your everything were taken out to nowhere and you float somehow helplessly when you sit in a classroom with a teacher no expression saying words senseless.well,that may be not some enduring for me even i really feel bored at times.in fact,i made great efforts,studying,living and trying hard to be good,substantial.and you see,my present situation,happy ending is perhaps the same like yours. once there may be someone talked to you with"ah,hum,you own a lot of things and you live a happy life..."that's it.i think i'm in a happy life. i eat lots of food,sleep every night,talk with classmates,take courses,do school assignments,play,have fun,kill the time.i wonder what i'm looking for.do you ever thought about that?maybe.you may not know me well enough ,yet i can like you sometime,then i am hating you,sometimes admire you and envy you.finally,actually we don't know each other at all. i believe life will be better.boys in our room are those can't know my heart well,nor will i like to understand them.we are roommates and classmates,but not real friends. are these persons around us we know?however,life just goes on.and i just wonder why the world we live in could be so indifferent sometimes.i merely wander between reality and fantasy,wondering what to do and how to do it.maybe that's my individual and wrong feelings lead to these words.maybe.... This artical was written by me years ago, now I assume that it may like to encounter some readers.Thank you.