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  • Posted
    Every one of us should become a vegetarian because eating meat can cause serious health problem. Some people hold a view that eating meat will damage our health, we need to adopt a vegetarian diet in out daily life. In my opinion, I do not agree that this is the efficient method to solve this problem, and keeping a balanced diet, consists vegetable and some healthy meat, is the key. There are some reasons. Firstly, meat, which includes a lot of basic elements, provides energy for everyone to keep working and studying, is also important nutrition source for human being. Secondly, bad habit, which is a more common phenomenon for most people, include lack of sleeping and exercise, leads to the health problem, especially for students. For instance, more and more students with weak physical condition are because they lack of sleeping time and they do not do any exercise. Thus, if everyone becomes a vegetarian, there still exist some problems, which are led to by another situation. The vegetable has many vitamins like vitamin C, D and B12. These elements are quite important for human being and help our to keep healthy. It is true that a growing number of modern people do not like eating vegetable now. However, it is not to say that we only eat vegetable, without any meat. The most useful way is that we should balanced our daily diet. We can get vitamin from vegetable and we get protein from meat. In my view, I still do not agree with this opinion, we need become a vegetarian. This is only an extremely method, and health issue is also caused by other conditions. Obviously, to balanced our diet, which is the most efficient way to solve it.
    November 15, 2016
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  • Corrected

    这是我修改后的全文,然后供参考。

    陈奂生上城
    几天前以前,我看完了一个中国故事。这个故事叫陈奂生上城。陈奂生是一个农民,他的生活很不错,但是相比于同村的其他人来说,他显然不是个有趣的人。有一天他要进城卖油绳,然后打算用卖油绳赚的钱买一顶帽子。但是他在城里逛街的时候突然觉得不舒服,所以他决定找个地方坐下来休息一会。这时一位在城里当官的人看见了陈奂生,认出了他。因为以前他在陈奂生的村子里工作过。这位官员发现陈奂生生病了,可能有点发烧。所以他决定送陈奂生到招待所休息,然后继续去做他的工作。陈奂生醒来以后发现了他在招待所,他还有一点不舒服,但是他决定了要离开招待所。一个女服务员在服务台告诉陈奂生要付钱。陈奂生听到价格以后脸上一直冒汗。他不敢相信在招待所住一夜这么贵。他付钱以后感觉很难受。他突然想起来可以告诉她太太一些什么东西了,他明白了这是一次很好的经历,因为他可以在他的村子里告诉别人这次经历,大家会觉得他是个很有趣的人。

     

    0 voted
    October 11, 2015
    1
  • Corrected

    陈换(奂)生上城

    几天以前我看完了一个中国故事。这个故事叫陈换(奂)生上城。陈换(奂)生是一个农民, 按照他他的生活不错(他的生活很不错),但是他比其他的人从他的村子不太有趣的人(但是相比于同村的其他人来说,他显然不是个有趣的人)。 有一天他上城来了(要进城)卖油绳,然后(打算用卖油绳赚的钱)买一顶帽子。但是他在城里(逛街的)时候一下子(突然)觉得不舒服, (所以)他决定了(找个地方)坐一下(下来)休息一点(会)。同时(这时)一位官(在城里当官的人)看(见)了陈换(奂)生,认出(了)他。 因为以前他在陈换(奂)生的村子有事(里工作过)。这位官(官员)发现了陈换(奂)生生病了, 他(可能有点)发烧了。所以他(决定)送陈换(奂)生到招待所(休息),然后需要继续他的旅行(去做他的工作)。陈换(奂)生醒来以后发现了他在招待所,他还有一点不舒服,但是(他)决定了(要)离开招待所。一个姑娘(女服务员)在服务台告诉陈换(奂)生(要)付钱。陈换(奂)生听到价格以后在他的脸上(一直)出(冒)汗。他不可以(敢)相信(在招待所)住一夜在招待所太(这么)贵了。他付钱以后太(感觉很)难过(很难受)。他(突然)想起来(可以)告诉他太太一些什么(东西了)。突然他明白了这(是)个(一次)很好的经历,因为在他的村子他可以(他可以在他的村子里)告诉别的人这个故事(次经历),大家会想(觉得)他(是个)很有趣的人。

     

    这篇文章写得很不错!只是在细节上有一点问题。这是我第一次帮别人改文章,水平有限看起来比较混乱。有两个地方需要特别说下:

           1、"然后需要继续的他的旅行"。因为这篇文章是我在中学时期(Middle school)学的课文,具体内容有一点忘记了,大致记得这个官员之后是去工作,不过写"旅行"语法来说上也没有错误。

           2、"因为在他的村子他可以告诉....."。中文的语言习惯写成:因为他可以在他的村子里告诉.....。把"在他的村子"写在前面也没有语法错误,习惯上来说"他可以"在前会觉得通畅一点。

     

     

    0 voted
    October 11, 2015
    0