Please examine my essay please!
In todays' globalized society, many people believe that young people enjoy their lives more than older people. Some people have advocated that young people have a healthy body healthy bodies, so young people they can enjoy their lives (more), but I don't agree with this view. I firmly believe that old people/ or seniors can enjoy their lives. This is because young people live in have busy and hectic lifestyles.
First of all, young people waste their time trying to succeed in their field/careers, so they cannot enjoy their lives. In other words, they are so busy that they cannot take pleasure in their life. For example, a study done by the New York Times shows that young people in the modern society are suffering from various mental diseases such as depression and nervous breakdowns. This study indicates that young people are under the great stress that keeps us them from being healthy, and they don't have enough time to enjoy leisure-time activities. Thus, young people are under great stress compared to older people and do not have enough time outside of work so they cannot are uable to enjoy their lives.
In conclusion, it is my belief that old seniors are happier than young people. In summary Young people under great stress and do not have enough leisure time Hence,while older people seniors have little stress and have more free time to spend for on pleasure, so they are happier than young people.
(I just tried to make it sound more natural/formal and take out redundancies, I hope my notations are helpful!)