Please help me with my English..

Even though my love story is poor (-->This doesn't sound very natural in English.  It might be better to say something like "Even though my heart is broken"), I will not give up hope. It's not wasn't just once that you've hurt my heart. me, but it was the first time I my self witness saw it with my own eyes.

Thanks

Today

I started italki, but I don't know what to do on this.
I want to make a new friend.

(yukatt-さん、こんにちは、友達になりましょうです^^ I hope I said that correctly.  

As for the minor corrections, remember that the word "I" is always capitalized, especially at the beginning of a sentence :)  You can also use the word "here" instead of "this," and say "I don't know what to do on here."

Also, on italki, you can continue to write notebook entries in whatever languages you want to learn and get feedback from native speakers.  You can also find language exchange partners, but I guess you already knew all this ^^ If you need help with anything, please don't hesitate to ask! Good luck!)

TVXQ!, JYJ, MBLAQ and U-KISS :D

The sound of footsteps

Many people live in my apartment building. A friend of mine also lives on the floor under my room below mine. We have known each other since we were teenagers.

I sometimes hear the sound of my neighbors' footsteps when I'm in my room. I can't tell which is who's, but I can tell which is hers without seeing her.

Whenever I hear it, I look down at (if you are looking directly down below, then use "at."  If you are looking down the street itself, then keep it as is) the street from the my window. It's I'm sure that she is walking there. ^^

(This is very poetic, Hana-san.  Your English is amazing.  すごい!  And thank you again for looking at my notebook :) )

Help me if you can. I am feeling down...

(Oh no, don't feel down!  Just keep doing your best, and it'll be alright!)

Hi everyone!

First, I'd like to thank you for your taking the time to reading my note.  This is That's my first one.  I know I am here to learn, but I also want to apologize for my terrible English. (Your English is so good.  I don't know what you are talking about!) I promised promessed to myself writing here, "I won't use any kind of source which will would help me to translate any words. (or you could take out "any words" altogether)" I need to confess that it is difficult for me... But I am truly really writing with my own knowledge of English.

If you want, feel free to give me any kind of tip or a bit of advice.  I'd really appreciate it like much more if you would use some "phrasal verbs" in your correction becouse I don't know how to use "phrasal verbs," and I feel frustated with it... I wish I could... Phrasal verbs sounds more natural speaking English.

I want to improve my English, and I really need to learn Chinese Mandarin. I work with Chinese people, and my lack of knowledge in this language is holding me back in my career. I can move up or climb claim up the this ladder if I become proficient in these this two languages, or in at least in one of them.

Thank you for while! I hope to hear something back from you guys!

Here's a big hug!

PS - If you need any help in Brazilian Portuguese, you can count on me!

(I broke up your paragraph into smaller ones.  Try to start a new paragraph every time you change topics.  

Also, try to avoid using commas where a period should be used to separate sentences.  A comma is typically only used when you are connecting two parts of a sentence with a conjunction (like and, but, or, etc), or when you are listing things (I like cheese, milk, ice-cream and cake).  There are a lot of resources online for proper comma usage and punctuation like http://www.informatics.sussex.ac.uk/department/docs/punctuation/node00.html) 

Just keep asking questions, searching for guides on grammar, and practicing.  You did an excellent job just using your own knowledge though!  Good luck!)