English Composition: Agrees or Disagree
Topic is: Violence on TV and the Internet should be centered censored
I agree with the idea that violence on TV and the Internet should be
centered censored and I have two reasons to support this opinion.
First of all, that violence on TV and the Internet increases the rate of crimes. For example, the murders and crimes that hurt people with weapons are influenced by these types of movies and videos.*
Similarly, the it has bad effects on children, which are is the most serious problem. These Violent movies and videos are leading children to the bad behavior in adulthood, and which are also is consequently passed on to their children. I think It's this is a bad cycle.
It's** true that TV and the Internet are very convenient in that anyone can search and learn about anything at any time.
However, if you mistake how to use them misuse them (or 'if misused'), it will lead to bad results. This is especially true for children, because it's often difficult for them to distinguish right from wrong (or 'distinguish between appropriate and inappropriate') information. Therefore, I believe that violence on TV and the Internet should be centered censored.
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Suggestions (for formal/essay writing)
* Whenever you argue something, it is good to include statistics. If statistics are unavailable, it is better to change the sentence to: ... violence on TV and the Internet are likely to/may/etc. increase the crime rate. You should then explain why (so that you are more credible). You can include "for example", but it doesn't really explain why. You could consider something along the lines of: violence seen on TV and the Internet may lead to the condoning of such behavior in society, etc.
** It is best to not use contractions in formal writing (i.e. "it's" -> "it is").
If this is not a composition of formal writing, please ignore the above.
Great work! I hope this helps =)