English composition: Agree or disagree Topic is above the text

Topic is: The number of young people who live with their parents after they finish their education will increase in the future.

I agree with that the number of young people who live with their parents after they finish their education will increase in the future, and I have two reasons to support this opinion.

To begin with, Japan is facing a long recession, hence therefore many people cannot afford to raise the cost of living as they used to, and if young people are independent of their parents and make a living on their own, they will have to take get a part time job. Then they cannot spend time to their hobbies or study.

Secondly, living alone is dangerous. Nowadays, the rate of crimes is increasing, thus many parents often think young people should not live alone. It's true that living with parents is inferior to living alone in terms of personal freedom.

However, considering the cost of living and safety, the choice of that young people are living independent of their parents could may not say be a good choice., therefore Therefore, I believe the number of young people who live with their parents after they finish their education will increase in the future.

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Please correct it !!

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Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this topic! I agree that these days, it's difficult for young people to live independently after finishing their education. The cost of living in many places are increasing, yet work wages continue to remain the same. This makes it difficult for people to afford things such as a place to live. 

I'm not a native..hope this helps > https://en.oxforddictionaries.com/explore/number-of-people-is-or-are/

Topic is: The number of young people who lives with their parents after they finish their education will increase in the future.

I agree with that the number of young people who lives with their parents after they finish their education will increase in the future, and I have two reasons to support this opinion.

To begin with, Japan is facing a long recession, hence many people cannot afford to raise the cost of living as they used to, and if the young people are independent of their parents and make a living on their own, they will have to take a part time job., Then then they cannot spend time to their hobbies or study.

Secondly, living alone is dangerous. Nowadays, the rate of crimes is increasing, thus many parents often think the young people should not live alone. It's true that living with parents is inferior to living alone in terms of personal freedom.

However, considering the cost of living and safety, the choice of that those young people are independent of their parents, could not say a good choice, therefore, I believe the number of young people who lives with their parents after they finish their education will increase in the future.

<176words>

Please correct it !!