Corrections · 5
SalahBetul
Pendapat Saya
한국 피아니스트 : 이루마
저는 몇개의 문제 때문에 가지 이유로 한국을 좋아해요. 이루마는 그들 중 하나예요. 저는 이루마를 좋아해요. 이루마가는 대단한훌륭한 피아니스트예요. 저는 그의 작업곡을 좋아해요. 저는 Dreams-을 가장 좋아해요. 그 노래연주는 저를 평화스러운온하게 만들어해요. 저는 묵상(명상)을 좋아해요. 저는 이루마를 만나고 싶어요. 저는 인도네시아에 이루마를가 오다면 바래좋겠어요. 저는 그의 음악연주회를 바라볼 거예요. 저는 그의 음악회를 바라볼 거예요. 저는 Dreams-을 모두그와 함께 상연주하고 싶어요. 그것이 현실로이 바래되면 좋겠어요. ^^V
\^o^/
한국 피아니스트 : 이루마
저는 몇개의 문제 이유때문에 한국을 좋아해요.
:문제 means the problem which has the negative connotation. so 이유 which means "reason" in English is much more appropriate here because you are saying positive things of Korea :-)
이루마가는 대단한 피아니스트예요.
:The difference between "가"and "는" is hard to explain to others, since it pick up which one to use naturally..I think you should check up the usage on the internet. :0.
그 노래는 저를 평화스러운 평화스러운 기분이 들게 만들어요.
:The song makes you "feel peaceful" right? so 기분이 들다 which means "makes feel" should be used here. 들다 is transformed into 들게 in order to be connected with 만들어요, the real verb of the sentence.
저는 인도네시아에 이루마를 오다가 오기를 바래요.
:"이루마가 오기" is the noun phrase which means "the coming of 이루마" in Korean. 바래요 needs a noun object so I made the noun phrase out of "이루마를 오다" which doesn't make sense either by being read alone. 이루마 is the subject of the verb "오다" so you need to use 가 instead of 를,.
저는 Dreams-을 모두 함께 상연 관람하고 싶어요.
:상연 means "to stage, or to present" in Korean, and I don't think you will go to play the instrument with 이무라 on the stage :0. So the appropriate verb here is 관람하다 which means "to watch". Or you can just say "Dreams을 모두 보고 싶어요" with the easy verb 보다 which means the same things as 관람하다. 관람하다 is a big verb that people tend to use when they write, not talk.
함께 means together (with other people), which needs the indication of people you go with. However, you didn't specify whom you go with to the concert of 이루마, I erased it.
그것이 현실로 이루어지기를 바래요 ^^V
: 현실 is "reallity" in Korean. So Something Comes into reallity should be translated into Korean as "현실(reallity)로(into) 이루어지다(come)". Come is usually translated into 오다, but in this specific expression 이루어지다 means come in Korean.
I hope this will help you. Your Korean is very good compared to other articles I have seen here :-)
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