A day I shall never forget

It was a day I shall never forget. She left without a word. I looked at her pale face and cold body. My tears just flowed. I still remember vividly that fateful day. A phone call from Johor brought news that my beloved grandmother had met with an accident. To me, my grandmother was just like my best friend. She taught me many things and was always there for me.

We left Kuala Lumpur immediately after we heard about the news but when we arrived at Muar, my father's mobile phone rang. The person My uncle was at the other end of the line, that was my uncle who sadly told informed us that grandmother had just passed away. Our hearts broke and we were sobbing uncontrollably.

I will never,ever, forget the day she left us. May Allah bless her and may her soul rest in peace. Amin.

Excellent!  Your level of English dispels me of my thoughts that the standard of English in your country had deterioated so much after it ceased to be a British colony; as indicated by your country fellow men's essays.

A day I shall never forget

It was a day I shall never forget. She left without a word. I looked at her pale face and cold body. My tears just flowed. I still remember vividly that fateful day. A phone call from Johor brought news that my beloved grandmother had met with an accident. To me, my grandmother was just like my best friend. She taught me many things and was always there for me.

We left Kuala Lumpur immediately after we heard about the news but when we arrived at Muar, my father's mobile phone rang. The person at the other end of the line, that was my uncle, who sadly told us that grandmother had just passed away. Our hearts broke and we were sobbing uncontrollably.

I will never,ever, forget the day she left us. May Allah bless her and may her soul rest in peace. Amin.