Could you correct my essay, please?
Question: People attend college or university for many different reasons (for example, new experiences, career preparation, increased knowledge). Why do you think people attend college or university? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
People study at university for many different reasons. Some of the most important reasons are to obtain new knowledge and good skills. However, there are also many other reasons students go to college; to make new friends or to get a good job in the future. However, I suppose that people enter the university because of the following reasons. (You should put a thesis statement that includes all of your topic sentences from all 3 body paragraphs below.)
Firstly, almost everyone wants to have a decent job. In order to have a good employment, they have to obtain new knowledge and increase their skills. By attending college, people can fulfill these requirements and have a better career path. In addition, it is likely for college students to be more prepared for employment after graduation. This is the first thing why I suppose that people study at colleges and universities. (I don't think this is a good last sentence for the first paragraph.)
Secondly, some people attend university to expand their connection. Some people enjoy their lives in college, because they can meet people that have similar interests and hobbies with themselves.
Lastly, students enter universities to gain more knowledge. Studying is an interesting thing that make our lives rich and colorful. Furthermore, as technology advances in our world, it is necessary for people to have more and more education.
In conclusion, there are many factors that may influence people’s decision attend the university: some may attend it for new experience, and others just to make new friends. (You should write a sentence that summarize the 3 topic sentences and it is suggested to add recommendations in this conclusion.)
