could you check my sentence? However , this who supports the negative sides of retirement also presents valid argument. The main reason that supports my view is that many companies might lose rich experience as retiring older workers who have such experience. To be specific, young workers are experientially more insufficient than older workers who have a great deal of experience. Therefore, retiring might be not good both companies and older workers. In conclusion, it is true that people have different views when it come to retiring. Personally, i mostly agree that retirement has positive effects on local economy such as efficiency of work and growth of youth employment rate while merits of  Keeping work without retiring should not be overlooked.

could you check my sentance ? However , this who supports the negative sides of retirement also presents valid argument. The main reason that supports my view is that many companies might lose rich experience as retiring older workers who have such experience. To be specific, young workers are experientially more insufficient than older workers who have a great deal of experience. Therefore, retiring might be not good both companies and older workers. In conclusion, it is true that people have different views when it come to retiring. Personally, i mostly agree that retirement has positive effects on local economy such as efficiency of work and growth of youth employment rate while merits of Keeping work without retiring should not be overlooked.