Hey, I would appreciate it if you would correct my essay "Cities"

Fresh water has always been a limited resource in some parts of the world. Today however, the growing worldwide demand has made this a global problem.

What are the causes of the increased of demand and what measure could governments and individuals take to respond to this problem?

Answer

Planet Earth has been widely known as the “Blue Planet” because of the huge amounts of water. However, only five percent of this can be consumed by human beings. Contamination and the growing rate of births has had an unmeasurable impact on drinkable water sources, rocketing the demand of this valuable resource.

Academics and politicians have addressed the Global Warming as the major enemy sources of fresh water. For instance, because of the Global Warming eighty percent of glaciers, which are the main generators of drinkable water, has disappeared. This has directly affected the reserves of water making it difficult for some regions to access it. Therefore, it is important that governments reinforce the use of harsh fines or even imprisonment to tackle the growing emission of carbon.

Overpopulation is another major problem which has negative consequences on water sources, increasing the world demand. For example, within a decade, the planet will have ten billion of inhabitants and according to some studies, there will not be enough water for everyone. Some countries have restlessly lead policies and world agreements to approach the population issue. Nonetheless, governments should take steps to control and keep birth rates low. In addition, it is crucial that governments directly manage and distribute water to ensure an adequate control of it.

In short, the increase of the population and pollution are destroying the world reserves of water making it not available in several parts of the world. It is required that world leaders take the control of this on going problem to assure that coming generations will have a decent lifestyle and have the best resources available.

Can someone correct this please :)

When I was little, in the evenings I used to go to my grandmother's house and one day I took the opportunity to do all the things my mother would not let me do like: playing video games on the game boy, eating chocolate ice-cream as a snack... One afternoon, I was playing with my cousin who is three years older than me. I locked myself in a closet bathroom to scare my grandmother. The problem was, I did not know who was outside and I was locked out for half an hour waiting for my cousin or my grandmother to come. 

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hello my name is claudiane, I am Brazilian, I would like to learn English, could someone help me?