A Cover Letter

Dear Joe,

I am writing to apply for the System Analyst currently advertising on the JobsDB website(Ref NO: 111111).

I have been working in system design and development for over 10 years. At my last company, I started as a Senior Software Engineer being responsible for developing and testing E-Banking Systems. After three years, I was promoted as a Project Manager taking in charge of product design, project management and team building. After three years as a Project Manager until now, I have been a R&D manager for over one year. I am charge of technical platform building and maintenance, team management and presale technical support.

 

"<em> For the part in RED, I am not sure I can not tell whether you are saying that you were a project manager for three years and you are currently employed as a R&D manager for over the past year. And you are in charge of team management and presale technical support. If that is what you are trying to say than you should change it to "</em>Following three years as a Project manager I am currently employed as a R&D manager for a little more than a year. I am in charge of technical platform building and maintenance, team management, and presale technical support.<em>"</em>

I am self-motivated, and creative, and I am very interested in new technology. I am always thinking how to apply new technology to improve our product and expand our business. I am looking for a position with more responsibility, where I can fully use my professional skill. 

I have attched my CV for your reference. Please feel free to contact me if you have any further concern or problem.  Questions or comments.

 

<em>For the part in Green in an letter to a potential employer you are not wanting them to contact you due to a concern or problem. However you will want them to contact you for any further questions about your experience or qualifications. </em>

<em></em>

I am looking forward to hearing from you. Thanks. Thank you.

 

For the part in Orange the word thanks, is not formal. In a letter to a potential employer, you want to be formal. "Thank you" would be much more appropriate in this situation.

Best regards,
Jeffery.     "Always insert first and last name for formal letters"

You did a great job other than the few errors! Keep up the good work!! :)

 

A Nice Day!

Today was a hot day,and the sun seemed to be bigger than before,which was what I thought.I am always working even today.

 

Since you said that today was a hot day. That means that today is over with and you are writing this in the past tense. In this situation "might be" is written in present tense. In order for it to agree with the rest of the current sentence, it would need to be written in past tense. The easiest way to do this is to use "seemed to" which is a synonym in the pst tense that goes with the rest of the sentence. In the second sentence you should say " I am always working, even today" If you say "WAS" and then say "even today" than it contradicts what you are trying to say. 

 

I tried to simplify the explanation as much as possible, I apologize if it does not make any sense and please forgive any typos... I type kinda fast and it can eventually lead to errors in my spelling and punctuation.

My school

My school is beautiful,it is very big, it is about 0.358 km, it has a lake and a lotus pond.

 

You would need to specify whether the school is 0.358 km in width or length. 

Width= It is about 0.358 km wide

Length= It is about 0.358 km long

 

However, when talking about how big an building is "in the united states" we generally refer to square feet. 

If you are talking about an area of land, you would use acres.