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Russia flagYana Vishnyakova
Could you please correct my mistakes? I'd say Toby had a difficult childhood because his parents were going through a rough patch: they would argue a lot and wouldn't spend a lot of time with him. He was constantly getting mixed messages from his strict father and his soft mother, who tried to comfort him every time he burst into tears.

Toby was actually a bit of a handful for his parents, too. He was prone to outbursts and answering back and had a stubborn streak.

On the other hand, his coach said that Toby came across as quite disciplined and extremely talented. He also mentioned his taking things in his stride regardless to how much pressure was put on him on the pitch. I would say sports distracted Toby from all the trouble and kept him focused.

I guess he still likes his ex-girlfriend. If he hadn't bumped into her at that party and seen her with the other guy, he wouldn't have started the fight and therefore wouldn't have been arrested.

I hope it's just a setback and he won't be expelled. I would advise him to keep concentrating on trainings as it's the best place to blow off his steam. Moreover, he could go professional.

Corrections · 2

1

Could you please correct my mistakes?

I'd say Toby had a difficult childhood because his parents were going through a rough patch: they would argue a lot and wouldn't spend a lot of time with him. He was constantly getting mixed messages from his strict father and his soft mother, who tried to comfort him every time he burst into tears.

Toby was actually a bit of a handful for his parents, too. He was prone to outbursts and answering back and had a stubborn streak.

On the other hand, his coach said that Toby came across as quite disciplined and extremely talented. He also mentioned his taking things in his stride regardless to how much pressure was put on him on the pitch. I would say sports distracted Toby from all the trouble and kept him focused.

I guess he still likes his ex-girlfriend. If he hadn't bumped into her at that party and seen her with the other guy, he wouldn't have started the fight and therefore wouldn't have been arrested.

I hope it's just a setback and he won't be expelled. I would advise him to keep concentrating on trainings as it's the best place to blow off his steam. Moreover, he could go professional.

Excellent writing!

1

Could you please correct my mistakes?

I'd say Toby had a difficult childhood because his parents were going through a rough patch. They would argue a lot and wouldn't spend much time with him. He was constantly getting mixed signals from his strict father and his soft mother, who tried to comfort him every time he'd burst into tears.

Toby was actually a bit of a handful for his parents, too. He was prone to outbursts and talking back and had a stubborn streak.

On the other hand, his coach said that Toby came across as quite disciplined and extremely talented. He also mentioned his taking things in his stride regardless to how much pressure was put on him on the pitch. I would say sports distracted Toby from all the trouble and kept him focused.

I guess he still likes his ex-girlfriend. If he hadn't bumped into her at that party and seen her with another guy, he wouldn't have started the fight and therefore wouldn't have been arrested.

I hope it's just a setback and he won't be expelled. I would advise him to keep concentrating on training as it's the best way to blow off his steam. Moreover, he could go professional.

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