Search from various English teachers...
Spain flagConcepción
Tiredness The more tired you are, the easier you can get angry. It is known that when you are tired your sight ample is reduced until to became the tunnel-vision, and with the patience occurs the same. For sure, you can easily find a situation whether you would not be so tired you would have behaved in a more reasonably way, reaching more satisfactory results. When you lost your patience and your reflexes and you know your performance are substantially below your skills it is not surprising that your temper rises until made you boil. Hence, be cautious and when you feel you are getting tired don’t take any risk or any challenge which you can regret later.

Corrections · 4

2

Tiredness

The more tired you are, the easier you can get angry. It is known that when you are tired your ample (adj) sight  is reduced until to it becames the tunnel-vision tunnel vision, and with the patience occurs the same. For sure, you can easily find a situation (in which) whether you would not be so tired, you would have behaved in a more reasonably way, (thus) reaching more satisfactory results. When you lost lose your patience and (consequently) your reflexes, and (while) you know your performance are substantially below your skills, it is not surprising that your temper rises until made it makes you boil over. Hence, be cautious and when you feel you are getting tired, don’t take any risk or any challenge which you can may regret later.

Well done! 

I suggest you to elaborate the sentences more with the help of conjuctions and adverbs. 

The right punctuation helps the reader to go through your text more easily. An independent clause in the middle of a sentence which gives extra information and can be easily omitted should be put between comas. 

Tense unity is one of the most important factors in making a text coherent. Pay more attention plz.

"May" shows probability and is offered to be used instead of "can" which indicates a stronger probability or capability.

Good luck! 

1

Tiredness

The more tired you are, the easier you can get angry. It is known that when you are tired your sight (ample) is reduced until it becomes/turns into the tunnel-vision, and the same happens with patience. For sure, Surely, you can easily find a situation where if only you had not been so tired you would have behaved in a more reasonably way, thus /therefore reaching/receiving more satisfactory results. When you lose your patience along with your reflexes and you know your performance are/is substantially (below your skills/below average), it is not surprising/It isn't a surprise that (it causes) your temper rises (your temper to rise) and make you boil (with rage [jaja]). Hence/So, be cautious and when you feel you are getting tired don’t take any risks or (any) challenges that you might later regret. 



I tried to make your entry more natural sounding so you don't sound too stiff. ;] 


edit :typo


orange text goes together! 



Want to progress faster?

Join this learning community and try out free exercises!

Don’t miss out on the opportunity to learn a language from the comfort of your own home. Browse our selection of experienced language tutors and enroll in your first lesson now!

Start Learning Today