MY CHILHOOD: WONDERFUL MEMORIES.
I was born and grew up in a little village surrounded by mountains, called Sant Jaume de LLierca. It was a beautiful and unspoiled place where two rivers embraced the town. There were also two creeks with crystal water, in one of them has been formed a natural pool where I learned to swim. There I spent a lot of afternoons with my brothers and my friends. Despite the water was really cold and some little animal appeared sometimes into the water, for us was a paradise.
Usually, we went there in the afternoon because in the morning big trees covered the swimming hole. On the contrary, for a few hours after lunch, the sun put out among the trees.
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Corrections · 4
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MY CHILHOOD: WONDERFUL MEMORIES.
I was born and grew up in a little village surrounded by mountains called Sant Jaume de LLierca. It was a beautiful and unspoiled place where two rivers embraced the town. There were also two creeks with crystalline water. In one of them has been formed a natural pool had formed where I learned to swim. There I spent a lot of afternoons with my brothers and my friends. Despite the water being really cold and with animals appearing sometimes in the water, it was, for us, a paradise.We usually went there in the afternoon because, in the morning, big trees covered the swimming hole. A few hours after lunch, however, the sun would come out among the trees.
The poetry of your writing is very good! I might suggest a passive construction for "embraced the town". Try: It was a beautiful and unspoiled place that was embraced by two rivers.
English-speakers use "a lot" much too much, in my opinion. When writing, especially with beautiful prose such as your own, just use: "many".
It is not common for English-speakers to begin a sentence with "Normally" or "Usually". We place it after the verb in most cases. If you do feel the need to begin a sentence with it, always separate it with a comma: "Usually, my mother would say nothing."
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MY CHILHOOD: WONDERFUL MEMORIES.
I was born and grew up in a little village surrounded by mountains, called Sant Jaume de LLierca. It was a beautiful and unspoiled place where two rivers embraced the town. There were also two creeks with crystal water, and in one of them has been formed there was a natural pool where I learned to swim. There I spent a lot of afternoons with my brothers and my friends. Despite Even though the water was really cold and some little animals appeared sometimes into the water, for us it was a paradise.Usually, we went there in the afternoon because in the morning big trees covered the swimming hole. On the contrary However, for a few hours after lunch, the sun put came out among through the trees.
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