Built to fail
Nowadays we are overwhelmed with differents sort of technologies. Some of them can not be considered sustainable like as smartphones and tablets.
Monthly we have news about new tendencies and new technologies coming on. A new brand bought yesterday will be replaced for a new release six months later and thus will be considered obsolete for the techies. Gadgets like smartphone and tablets have an endless beauty related a design but if we have not been used a case to protect them all of sudden they could fall down and have the screen broken.
I have been working with technology for a while and it is pretty difficult keeping up myself from all new features coming on. Unfortunately, some personal gadgets like smartphone have been lasting less than other devices as domestic appliances.
Search from various English teachers...
Corrections · 5
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Built to fail
Nowadays we are overwhelmed with differents sorts of technologies. Some of them can not be considered sustainable like as smartphones and tablets.Monthly we have news about new tendencies and new technologies coming on. A new brand gadget bought yesterday will be replaced for a by a new release six months later and thus will be considered obsolete for the techies. Gadgets like smartphones and tablets have an endless beauty related a design amazing and beautiful design but if we have not been used using a case to protect them all of sudden they could fall down and have the their screens broken.
I have been working with technology for a while and it is pretty difficult keeping to keep up myself from all new features coming on. Unfortunately, some personal gadgets like smartphones have been lasting less than other devices as domestic appliances.
1- Usually you use cannot, even in formal writing. Can not is grammatically fine, but is not common to see in a writing so is more natural to use cannot
2- Same thing here: You can understand generally what it means, but the phrase coming up is more common and natural.
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@Camila, You helped me a lot with your tip. I have been sharpened my writing skill and it is important to receive feedbacks like yours. Thank you again and have a nice weekend.
@Steve, I will use more these words to sound better in my conversation. Thanks for your time.
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Instead of "new tendencies", you could use the word "trend". That implies "new". And instead of "they could fall down" (which no native would say), "they could be dropped" is better.
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You have a good handling of grammar and structure! But I think that, by using a bit complicated structures, you lose track of what you want your sentences to communicate. I would recommend you to try keeping structures simple and getting comfortable with getting your message across. Even in professional writing, complicated structures just exhaust the reader, so my professors would tell me to keep them at the minimum. Hope I helped, and have a good day!
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