Two short translated stories in English 23.11.16
1.
A long time ago my dad had an elegant beard and mustache. When I was 4 years old, I really like painting. Once my dad forgot his passport on a magazine table. No big deal, but on that photo he didn't have a beard and mastage. I've decided to fix it and make a signature on every blank page so no one could say anything. My grandma got a shock. My mom and dad were laughing so hard, so they start hiccuping.
2.
There is one homeless man that lives near our apartment house. He survived some very cold winters. He always sits on the bench, sometimes he walks around. It is so nice to see that people give him food and stuff. We did the same as well.
The worst thing is that he is not some kind of alcoholic. He is quite a normal man. And I think that no one is safe from this life. And I'm so happy that these kind people help him, give him food and clothes.
Search from various English teachers...
Corrections · 1
1
Two short stories translated into English, 23 Nov 2016
* 23 Nov 2016 - use a date system that doesn't confuse British with American dates; for example 2/3/16 means 3 February in America but 2 March in Britain.
A long time ago my dad had an elegant beard and mustache. When I was 4 years old, I really liked painting. Once my dad forgot his passport on a magazine table. No big deal, but on that photo he didn't have a beard and mustache. I've decided to fix it and make a signature on every blank page so no one could say anything [ <--- it isn't clear what this sentence is trying to say]. My grandma got a shock. My mom and dad were laughing so hard they started hiccuping.
* mustache : another spelling is moustache
* so hard they started = so hard that they started (not so hard so they started)
2.
There is a/a certain homeless man that lives near our apartment. He has survived some very cold winters. He always sits on his bench, sometimes he walks around. It is so nice to see that people give him food and other things. We did the same as well.
The worst thing is that he is not some kind of alcoholic; he is quite a normal man, and I think that no one is safe from this life. I'm so happy that these kind people help him, giving him food and clothes.
* his bench - or 'a' bench or 'a certain' bench; you need to have mentioned the bench to speak of 'the' bench. 'His' doesn't mean he owns it, but he is strongly connected to it.
* has extends the past to the present.
* stuff is too informal/lazy
* Don't start sentences with 'and'.
* giving him food and clothes : or 'and give him food and clothes'
* Practise different punctuation, such as ; : - ! ?
Well done, David
Want to progress faster?
Join this learning community and try out free exercises!
Don’t miss out on the opportunity to learn a language from the comfort of your own home. Browse our selection of experienced language tutors and enroll in your first lesson now!
Start Learning Today
