[Day 05] Dear Diary.
1.
I went to an open lecture at Kunguk University.
It was held by Samsung and it was about "hyper-connected society".
They told us an example samsung's new refrigerator which is called "Family hub".
It has an monitor on the door. I thought it is totally useless for me to have a monitor on the door.
But they explained reasonable ideas.
2.
After the lecture, I ate Korean BBQ.
I was worried about that it was so late at night. But It was so delicious.
I'm not going to care about it. I assumed as a high calorie diet......:)
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Corrections · 2
1
[Day 05] Dear Diary.
1.I went to an open lecture at Kunguk University.
It was held by Samsung and it was about "hyper-connected society".
They told us an example An example they told us of hyper connected society is Samsung's new refrigerator which is called "Family hub", which has a monitor on the its door. I thought it is would be totally useless for me to have a monitor on the door of my refrigerator, but they gave sensible reasons for why it could be useful.
2.
After the lecture, I ate Korean BBQ.
I was worried about that it was eating such heavy food so late at night, but It was so delicious so I'm not going to worry about it. I assumed am just going to think of it as a high calorie diet......:)
Notes:
This diary is much better! A lot of the changes I made in this are actually just to make your sentences flow better, not because your sentences are grammatically wrong.
1. They told us an example: The way I wrote it is extremely explicit, but you could just as easily write: "they gave us the example of...."
We often use "give an example". But you have to use "the" because you are referring back to "hyper connected society".
2. about that --> "about that because": you could say this, but it is still a little bit ambiguous.
Good work again!
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