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Japan flagMulan Ling
CNN News: The rock band embroiled terrorist attacks held a concert in Paris again. The source: http://www.cnn.co.jp/showbiz/35078012-2.html You don't need to correct whole article. =============================================================== Eagles Of Death Metal (EODM), the rock band whose concert in Paris was attacked by terrorists last Nov., was back in Paris and held a concert again. I saw one of the audience with a bouquet of white roses in his arms and another with the pair of crutches. In the tragic event of Nov.13th on Paris, the terrorists attacked Bataclan theater while the band was giving a performance inside and 89 fans was killed. When Jess Hughes (the vocal) and the other members appeared on the stage, the hall was filled with the cheer of the audience. They stopped to play in the middle of the first number and asked for a moment of silence for the victims. Several hours before the concert, CNN had a interview with Hughes. He emphasized, "This Paris performance means much more than just a performance.". "I hope this concert will heal us and our fans.", he told. For this time, they performed in Olympia theater and more than 2800 people flocked including injured people in the attack or families of the victims. Bataclan theater still remain closed. In the theater, 30 psychotherapists were set in case the audience becomes too emotional And the place was strictly guarded to prevent the terrorist attack. EODM didn't play "Kiss the devil", the number they were playing when the shoot begun. One of the audience who lost his friend by the attack told, "It was perfect. Everybody hoped so strong to be happy, and they didn't give us time to be sad. I'm glad that I could forget even only for a while."

Corrections · 1

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CNN News: The rock band embroiled terrorist attacks held a concert in Paris again.

The source: http://www.cnn.co.jp/showbiz/35078012-2.html
You don't need to correct whole article.
===============================================================

Eagles Of Death Metal (EODM), the rock band whose concert in Paris was attacked by terrorists last Nov.,
were back in Paris and held a concert again.

I saw one of the audience with a bouquet of white roses in his arms and another with a pair of crutches.
In the tragic event of Nov.13th on Paris, the terrorists attacked the Bataclan theater while the band was giving a performance inside and 89 fans were killed.

When Jess Hughes (the vocalist) and the other members appeared on the stage, the hall was filled with the cheers of the audience.

They stopped playing in the middle of the first number and asked for a moment of silence for the victims.

Several hours before the concert, CNN had a interview with Hughes.He emphasized, "This Paris performance means much more than just a performance."."I hope this concert will heal us and our fans.", he said.

This time, they performed in Olympia theater and more than 2800 people flocked there including injured people in the attack or families of the victims.

The Bataclan theater still remains closed.


In the theater, 30 psychotherapists were present in case the audience became too emotional and the place was strictly guarded to prevent a  terrorist attack. EODM didn't play "Kiss the devil", the number they were playing when the shooting began.

One of the audience who lost his friend in the attack told us, "It was perfect. Everybody hoped so much to be happy, and they didn't give us time to be sad. I'm glad that I could forget even if only for a while."


Hello Mulan, 

This is a good translation and alothough I can't speak Japanese I did see the news article on the BBC this morning. In the first part you can use the EODM was or were - depending on whether you see them as a single unit, the band or the individuals. Here as the name is plural, (Eagles) I think it is better stylistically to use 'were'

At the end of the next part you used the passive but the verb (be) still needs to agree with the new 'subject' - They were.

The other common problem was with the verbs 'say' and 'tell'. When you use 'tell' you must always have a person after the verb.


Hope this helps


Bob


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