Depression Today I feel sad and upset in a way I've never experienced before. There was a family that passed away after a mortar bomb had hit their flat. I really feel sorry for them, but I was un

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Yazan

Depression Today I feel sad and upset in a way I've never experienced before. There was a family that passed away after a mortar bomb had hit their flat. I really feel sorry for them, but I was unbelievably calm about it then I realised that I no longer remember when was the last time I cried. My grandfather died 3 months ago and I still can't forgive myself for not dropping a tear. I used to care a lot about every single person on this planet but now I'm worried that the war is changing my personality into someone I don't want to be and sometimes, every time and a while, I feel like I don't have any feelings anymore. After being the top student in school and university, now I can barely open a book and I'm afraid of failing. I used to watch the Friends series when I feel depressed and start remembering then the good old days but now nothing seems to be able to cheer me up. I want to talk to someone about it but I've never shared my feelings with other. I always smile in public and have never showed weekness. Even now when I'm writing here on italki I'm not using my real name because I don't want some friend to see this and get into a conversation about it.

Corrections · 10

Feeling Depressed "Depression" can mean a type of mental sickness. This way there is no ambiguity in your title.

Today I feel sad and upset in a way I've never experienced before.

There was a family that passed away [This means they die of natural causes] killed after a mortar bomb had hit their flat. I really feel sorry for them, but I was unbelievably calm about it then until I realised that I did not longer remember when was the last time I cried.

My grandfather died 3 passed away months ago and I still can't cannot forgive myself for not dropping shedding a tear. I used to care a lot very much about every single person on this planet but now I'm worried that the War is changing my personality into someone I don't want to be. and Sometimes, every time and a while, I feel like I had become a zombie don't have any feelings anymore.

After being I was the top student in my school and university. Now I can barely open a book and I'm am afraid of failures. I used to watch the "Friends", the TV series whenever I feel depressed and start wanted to remembering the then the good old days but now -- nothing seems to be able to cheer me up.

I want to talk to with someone about it but I've never shared my feelings beforewith other. I always smile in public and have but never shown weakness. Even now when as I'm write here on italki, I'm not using my real name because I don't want some my non-virtual friends to see this and get into a conversation about start discussing it.

My condolences to your plight. War is never good. Still, you cannot run away from it all. My advice is to write! You have plenty of emotions pent up in you. Writing is an outlet. Because of those emotions, you can write extremely well. So use it to your advantage. Your essay is one of the better ones here. Hence caught my eye to correct and polish. Job well done.

I feel sad about what you're going through. I personally don't think it's weak to show such feelings. Sometimes, it's a real necessity to do so. Depression can do a lot of weird things to people. It can make you more anxious to do things as well. Also, you may focus more on yourself while going through it. You're not a heartless person, and also you seem to fear that you're becoming one so that must mean something. Try thinking on that for a second. If you were truly heartless, you wouldn't be caring if you were becoming heartless. It's just my opinion anyways. Like some of the others here have already said, write about your feelings more. This may help you get through some of the depression as the war goes on. Hopefully, this war will end soon.

thuy Bien, Horst, Rebecca: Thanks a lot. It's really good to have all that moral support.

I am sorry to hear about your pain and how it is affecting your life. Writing about it on here is your first step to recovery. You are brave for opening your heart just a little in this time of severe hardship. Try to find someone who you can share your pain with. Just talking to someone who understands what you have been though will help. Do not be ashamed, for it is a brave man who can admit his hurt.

sad to hear what you are going through :(

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