Do you have such a feeling sometimes?

Do you have such a feeling sometimes as if your soul is empty? You are like a doll puppet. You do something because you have to do it. Nothing can come through your the wall that you have build by had built yourself. You are like a shadow. You want to be nowhere and are nothing and nowhere to be found. And Then suddenly, one smile, like a small spring breaks crack in this wall and small suns begin to flash brighter and brighter here and there and you are alive..again a ray of sunlight shining through.  Brighter and brighter it becomes and you find yourself alive once more.