My daughters application letter.

After being fired last week, she now applies for a new job experience place. Please help me to correct this:

Leyanis
StreetName 13
1111 AA ALMERE

Almere, 13 november 2012

XXXX Europe B.V.
SomeStreetweg 413
1111 AA AMSTERDAM ZUIDOOST


Dear Sir, Madam,

I have read your advert on the website stagemarkt.nl, and I would like to apply for the position of Executive Secretary (“Directie Secretaresse voor internationale onderneming”)

What interests me the most in this position is the international character. I myself am half Spanish (Latin American) half Dutch. Thus I'm proficient in Spanish, Dutch and English.

What can I offer you? First of all, I'm a cheerful person  who can work independently without losing sight of the team I working in. I can speak refined Dutch, and have a good command of both English and Spanish. I always remain hungry for something new to learn. I am a vigorous girl of creativity, self-motivated to ask for work accuracy. My honesty always does my credit.

At present I am in school following an education for Secretary and Administration. The professional knowledge and working experience I have attained so far make me confident for my competence for the job. Most importantly, my previous working experiences during which I've undertaken similar tasks make me a valuable resource for your company. I would like to elaborate it in the personal interview.

Apart from all that: 저희 아버지는 한국 회사에서 일 하시며, 한국어 작성을 조금은 하실 수 있습니다. 이하 내용은 아버지가 적으신 것입니다. (1) 

My Curriculum Vitae is attached. I hope that it's detailed enough. I am looking forward to hearing from you.

Yours Sincerely,
Leyanis

(1) My dad works for a Korean company. And he has written this.

Leyanis
StreetName 13
1111 AA ALMERE

Almere, 13 november 2012

XXXX Europe B.V.
SomeStreetweg 413
1111 AA AMSTERDAM ZUIDOOST


Dear Sir, Madam,

I have read your advert on the website stagemarkt.nl, and I would like to apply for the position of Executive Secretary (“Directie Secretaresse voor internationale onderneming”)

What interests me the most in this position is the international atmosphere. I myself am half Spanish (Latin American) and half Dutch. Thus I'm proficient in Spanish, Dutch and English.

What can I offer you? (maybe written as: What can you expect from me?) First of all, I'm a cheerful person  who can work independently without losing sight of my team. I can speak refined Dutch, and have a good command of both English and Spanish. I always remain hungry (eager) to learn new things. I am a creative, self-motivated girl and prefer well defined assignments. My honesty is one of my main strengths.

At present, I am in school following an education for Secretary and Administration. The professional knowledge and working experience I have attained so far make me confident in my competence for the job. Most importantly, my previous working experiences during which I've undertaken similar tasks make me a valuable resource for your company. I would like to elaborate more in the personal interview.

Apart from all that: 저희 아버지는 한국 회사에서 일 하시며, 한국어 작성을 조금은 하실 수 있습니다. 이하 내용은 아버지가 적으신 것입니다. (1) 

My Curriculum Vitae is attached. I hope that it's detailed enough. I am looking forward to hearing from you.

Yours Sincerely,
Leyanis

(1) My dad works for a Korean company. And he has written this.