Original text 原文:

The real of me

My Chinese name is Liao qiongfang and I am 24 years old.There are 5 people in my family,my father,my mother,my old sister,my old brother and me.We love each other and live a happy life.My old sister have married.But I am still single.My hobbies are including make friends,traveling,swimming,singing and dancing.I am a lively and cheerful girl,sometimes I have a little willful.

Good job :)  很好, marvilloso, muito bem :)

Corrected text 纠正文:

The real of me

My name is Liao qiongfang and I am 24 years old.  There are five people in my family.  My father, mother, old sister, old brother and me.  We love each other and we live a happy life.  My older sister have is married, but I am still single.  My hobbies are traveling, swimming, dancing and making new friends.  I am a lively and cheerful girl.  Sometimes I am a little bit (little bit = 一点) (willful 设么？).

Note:  把两个空间之间的期间在句末标点符号和下一句的开头。把一个逗号后的一个空间

Put two spaces after the period at the end of a sentence and the word at the begining of the next sentence.  (.  The) Put one space between a comma and the next word. (sister, brother) 

Note:  There is a large difference in meaning between "my old sister" and my "older sister" You intended to use "older sister".

Note:  In american culture it is not necessary to mention whether a sibling ( brother, sister ) is older or younger in order to be respectful.  You can mention this because it is interesting, but it is not necessary in order to maintain respect.