我的一天 2

I rewrote this trying to follow all your suggestions. I haven't studied "完" yet, so I can't use it in this text. When I want to say "then", I must use only 以后，了, 再 or 然后。
Is it a little better now? I also have two questions:
When it means "then", is 再 the same as 然后?
And what's the difference between 一下儿 and 一会儿 after a verb?
谢谢

今天我早上九点起床，然后我吃早饭， 我喝了咖啡，还吃了一块饼。然后我再去商店买东西，买了一些水果、面包和一些鸡蛋。买东西以后，我就回家了。在家，我学习，然后我去做饭。我十二点半吃午饭。吃饭了，我上网，给朋友打电话。下午三点，我和我妈妈坐公共汽车去商场。我们吃了冰淇淋，看了看衣服。妈妈买了一件新衬衫。六点我们回家，我做作业，看电视。晚上七点半我去朋友家吃晚饭。我们一起吃比萨饼、喝可乐。我们再 然后我们（is better,for 再means again；anew；more；once more；any longer；any more,seems like immediately and faster than 然后。u can also use 然后再，然后我再）去操场看足球赛。我们喜欢足球。晚上十点半我回家我晚上十点半回家（subject before a sentence is usually better），上网一会儿   上一会儿网（一会儿、一下儿are usually inserted in a phrase,like 听一会儿歌，看一会儿电视），十一点我睡觉。

一会儿and一下儿 both mean a short time but 一下儿is shorter.一会儿emphasizes the last of the action is short while 一下儿emphasizes the action itself.

让我看一会儿（电视、卡通） let me watch... （for a while）

让我看一下（here 儿is redundant）let me have a look 

thats my understanding and may not be very authentic

我的一天 2

I rewrote this trying to follow all your suggestions. I haven't studied "完" yet, so I can't use it in this text. When I want to say "then", I must use only 以后，了, 再 or 然后。
Is it a little better now? I also have two questions:
When it means "then", is 再 the same as 然后?
And what's the difference between 一下儿 and 一会儿 after a verb?
谢谢

今天我早上我九点起床，。然后我吃早饭， 早餐，我喝了咖啡，还吃了一块饼。然后，我再去了商店买东西。我买了一些水果、面包和一些鸡蛋。买完东西以后，我就回家了。在家，我学了会习，然后我就去了做饭。我十二点半吃午饭。吃完饭了，我开始上网，给朋友打电话。下午三点，我和我妈妈坐公共汽车去商场。我们吃了冰淇淋，看看了衣服。妈妈买了一件新衬衫。六点我们回到家，我做作业，看电视。晚上七点半我去朋友家吃晚饭。我们一起吃比萨饼、喝可乐。我们再去操场看足球赛。我们喜欢足球。晚上十点半我回家，上了网一会儿网，十一点我睡觉。

我的一天 2

I rewrote this trying to follow all your suggestions. I haven't studied "完" yet, so I can't use it in this text. When I want to say "then", I must use only 以后，了, 再 or 然后。
Is it a little better now? I also have two questions:
When it means "then", is 再 the same as 然后?
And what's the difference between 一下儿 and 一会儿 after a verb?
谢谢

今天我早上我九点起床，然后我吃早饭。 我喝了咖啡，还吃了一块饼。之后，我再去商店买东西。我买了一些水果、面包和一些鸡蛋。买完东西以后，我就回家了。在家，我在家先学习，然后我去做饭。我十二点半吃午饭。吃完饭了后，我上网，给朋友打电话。下午三点，我和我妈妈坐公共汽车去商场。我们吃冰淇淋，看看衣服。妈妈买了一件新衬衫。六点我们回家，我做作业，看电视。晚上七点半我去朋友家吃晚饭。我们一起吃比萨饼、喝可乐。之后，我们再去操场看足球赛。我们喜欢足球。晚上十点半我回家，上网了一会儿网，十一点我睡觉。 

1、“完”in the article acts as the "ed" after a verb,meaning the action has finished. such as: 我吃完饭 / 我做完作业 /我写完作文

2、“一下（儿）”和“一会（儿）”Some times, they have the same meaning of "a short moment". for example: 请等一下/ 请等一会儿。

But “下”also acts as a meaureword sometimes. For example: 他踢了一下/两下/三下 门 （He kicked the door once/twice/three times）Here, “一下”means the action occured one time.