Before I start to correct your tale., may I suggest you put your entire story as a correction.  The correction box places no limit on how much you write.  This is how I circumvent the limition of the note and comment boxes.  Hope you will find this a good tip!  I don't know Russian to check if this is a good translation or not.  However, I think I do know enough Russian tales to see if it is a good story or not.  Not only am I correcting your English, I am embelish her and there to make the story more interesting and smoother.  So here goes...

A long long time ago, in the a faraway country, there lived in in the a beautiful palace, a lived the king and the Q  his queen. Although they strongly loved each other very much, they were childless.   but had no children. Every night the Queen prayed to God for a child, and at last she was blessed with a daughter. The yang young princess was beautiful, but enormously she was selfishnarcissistic, rude and rebellious girl. Everybody suffered from her pride and selfishness, willful ways including especially her parents. Time passes quickly and soon it was time for the princess to find a husband.  One day the time to find a husband for the young princess came.

The Her parents king and queen wanted her the princess to choose from the nobility,  a noble, generous and kind young and generous man, who then would become make a good king when the time comes. But However the fanciful spoilt princess refused every proposal just to hurt spite her parents, caring nothing of their opinons. family and to show the indifference to their opinion.

At last, in spite of everybody’s objections, Finally over the objections of everyone, she accepted the proposal of the neighbouring evil sorcerer;  the Lord of the Deserts.   nearby the old King’s lands, who was hated and feared by everybody in the kingdom All his subjects feared him for his cruelty. As the old When the King learnt about of his daughter’s choice, he got badly ill and was griefed tht he fell ill and soon died. The Queen then refused to ever see her daughter again and went to live in a nunnery monastery to lament in her grief till the end of her life. So the young The Princess and the evil sorcerer got were married and became the new King and Queen. This time was awfully It was a great misery hard for the whole kingdom, for they were the most merciless and cruel rulers that had ever existed. The King Sorcerer had set terribly high taxestaxed the people heavily; executed and tortured people just for his own pleasure and the stupid Queen merely laughed at it, considering everything treating all like a some funny games, and was exceedingly glad for her choice. 4. The Queen was smug and pleased wih her choice of a husband.  Everyday the sorcerer turned himself into an eagle and flew round the country realm to find and punish happy people. Everyone, who ventured to laugh or was in good humor, smiled or in a happy moodd was executed.  This is because , for the sorcerer could not cannot bear the very view thought of happiness or freedom.  He wanted to enslave al the  and wanted people to be his slaves. Meanwhile the Queen was sitting sat on her throne for hours, waiting for her husband. She was absolutely all alone and exceedingly bored, for nobody could entertain her.

At last she could not bear this situation anymore and ventured a secret to walk outside the castle. As she reached the marge edge of the forest she suddenly heard someone playing flute and froze in surprise. It was the a young shepard swain, who was sitting under the a tree, playing a beautiful but melancholy song. She Unwittingly started to she listened to him, hiding hidden from behind the a tree and not daring wanting to interrupt him. His flute awoke strange feelings in her heart. Something warm, something romantic and yet so full f sorrow. sad had Suddenly, as if awakened from a dream, arisen in her soul and she did not know, a new soul was born.  She did not know how to fight these strange new feelings. Soon she realized that she did not want to return back to the dark and cold castle; to her cruel and ugly husband whom she had never loved in the first place.  All it matters now is that Now she desired with all her heart only to stay here, with the young swain, shepard and to listen forever to his wonderful music forever.

As soon as she had realized it, she firmly The moment she realized h yearning, she resolved to run away from the castle and to leave her husband. So she was ready Just when she was about to confess her feelings to the shepard with her hands trying to reach out for him when she was snatched away in the claws of her husband in the form of an eagle as he was returning to the castle in the approaching evening.  Unknownst to the shepard,he saw nothing as he was playing his flute with his eyes closed.nknownst Swain and was already going to talk to him. But it was too late. While she was listening his flute behind the tree, evening had come and the Sorcerer – eagle was on his way home. He saw the Queen outside the castle, with her hands reached out to the Swain and got extremely angry, as strongly as he had never before. He grabbed her claws and brought away to the castle. The swain had noticed nothing, for he was playing flute with his eyes closed.

The Sorcerer was sure that the Queen dared to betray him and to fell in love with the Swain. That’s why he resolved to punish her in the most cruel way: he turned her into a bird, so she was free and could listen to the Swain's music and see him, but she wasn’t able to talk to him and to be with him. It was as painful for her as he wanted her to suffer. A lot of month had passed, and every day Queen was sitting on the tree branch and listening to the Swain’s lyrical flute. To ensure that the Queen can never betray him and at the same time to punish her in a most delicious way,he turned her into a bird.  He would grant her the wish to be able to listen to his songs and to be with him all the time and yet there is no way for her to express her feelings for him.  What an exceedingly torturous scheme. 

Many months passed and spring returned and Meanwhile the spring had come. And as flowers woke up after a from their winter's dream.  , Love, too awoke from the  arose in the Swain’s heart of the young shepard.  He fell  – he fall in love with the a young girl and were soon they got married - . It was the worst and the most painful day of the former Queen’s life. She suffered in Her soul was in anguish and pain tore at her heart. She wanted to cry, but there were no tears to shed in the bird’s eyes  … She had sacrificed her happiness for him, but but what he saw was only a beautiful bird that was silently listening to his songs silently. So From the unshed tears the anger arose vhemently in the Queen’s her heart.   and Soon anger gave way turned into the abhorrence. to hatred.

The Queen hated abored the beautiful bride for she had taken something, that didn’t belong her – the Swain  the shepard from her. At One night, soon after the wedding marriage, young Swain’s wife was walking near the forest alone, the new bride soon found herself walking in very place where her husband played the flute often.  She was smiling to herself and was full of happy thoughts about their  and happily thinking about her new life that had recently started. Accidentally she found herself near the place, where her husband used to play his flute and where at the moment The gloomy bird-Queen was sitting on the a tree, mulling and plotting and thinking over her revenge. As soon as she espied her hatred walking by, she could contain her anger no longer.  She swooped down and saw the young girl, she could not help her anger and pounced on her. The Queen unleased all her hated and fury upon the hurt helpless hapless girl.  She attacked with a vengence of a scorned work.  She used  with her wings to confuse her enemy, crabbed her and tried she used her talons to scratch to deface her beauty and she used her sharp beak to peck out her eyes out. Everybody was having fun on the marriage, so nobody could see it and help the poor girl. So died the young Swain’s wife at the most happy day of her short life. 10. The Swain was mourning his beloved wife for a long time.

No one came to the new bride's aid.  They were still in merriment in the village.  Alas the poor girl was no match an fell victim to the Queen.  The husband was devasted and her mourned for a long time until at last he decided to take revenge.

He desired only one thing: revenge. He swore to find and kill the murderer. He resolved, that the sorcerer was to blame for young girl’s death, for at those time he often turned into an eagle and punished happy people. His wife was killed by a huge bird and she was happy. So, everything was clear to the Swain. He believed that it was the work of the Sorcerer King.  He often took the form of an eagle to seek out happy people to wreck havoc on them.  His happy wife was killed with all the tell tale signs from a bird.  What more logic does one need? He took his father’s bow and tipped all the arrows with poisoned arrows and He headed went to the castle, intending to kill the Sorcerer or to die. 11. But he didn’t know how to realize his plan and revenge for his wife. He was weak and not too tall and the Sorcerer was strong and exceedingly powerful. His way to the castle passed through the place, where he used to play flute long time ago and where his wife then died. formulating a plan along the way.  The castle is well protected and he is only one person.  As he passed the same spot where his wife was killed and the same spot where he used to play his flute, There He saw the very bird that used to listen to his musicbefore.  The beautiful bird was sitting perched on the same branch and looking at him with her dark and big almost human looking eyes. His heart and soul were frozen by that strange and terrifying look. The bird had a gold key in its  her beak.   and It seemed that as though she was waiting for him there. Graciously she lent him a key. The bird dropped the key at his foot when she saw him and when he took the key, and the bird immediately flied flew to another branch and stared peered at him again. It was as if it was like asking him to follow her. The Swain, Charmed by her strange, human likeeyes, unwillingly he followed her as if he was in a trance. Soon they reached a secret door in the castle wall of the castle that leaded led to the Sorcerer’s bedroom of the sorcerer.

 Swain took the key and The golden key fit the hole of the secret door and the opened the secret door. Soon the shepard found himself in the bedroom and saw the sorcerer asleep.  He saw sleeping and helpless Sorcerer. “You’ve attacked my wife, a weak girl that couldn’t protect herself, so you don’t deserve a fair duel and I’ll kill you now!”-cried the Swain and twice shot Sorcerer with the poisoned arrows. His revenge was completed.

"Since you attacked a helples girl, you deserve no fair duel.  Have a tasty of my trusty arrows!".

With that, two poisoned arrows were let loose from his bow strings in succession.  As the sorcerer was breathing his last, the beautiful bird came flying in and settled near the avenger.  As soon as the last breath expired, the spell was broken and the bird transformed itself back to the former shape of the Queen.

"At last!  I'm freed from his evil spell!  I am the wife of the one thoust seeth before thee.  I suffered and could not lessen my pain.  However thy music had lightened my sorrows.  He punished me cruelly from loving thee by turning me into a bird. Now thou had saved me, I shall be thy wife knowingly how thy wife had been lost. I shall take over her place.  Only God knows how much I love thee."

As she spoke, those dark limpid pools sparkled in such sincerity that the avenger could not resist her charms.  At last the Queen got what she had desired her swain.  Now I am using this archaic word because of the archaic speech the Queen used to invoke an image of distant past by the readers.

He would never play his beautiful music, sitting under the tree, for his flute would never sing for him, for the murderer, again. As soon as the Sorcerer breathed his last, the beautiful bird landed near the Swain and turned into a fair young woman… “ I’m the Sorcerer’s wife, he cruelly punished me and turned into a bird! But I was absolutely innocent! I suffered and could not even cry to lessen my pain! Only your wonderful music helped me and made me a little happier…And now you have come and make me free from my terrible husband! How could I reward you?... I know, that you have just lost your beloved bride, but may be I could help you and become more affectionate and careful wife for you, for only God knows, how strongly I love you, my Swain! She looked at him with her dark, charming eyes and he could not resist, he forgot everything…At last the Queen got her Swain.

The Queen thought it was a happily ever after ending but she wa wrong.  Her love no longer played the flute.  He did not love her as much as he loved his first love.  He was gloomy and sad all the time.  The swain that the Queen first met was no longer alive in his body. Gradually the happiness of her triumph faded into nothingness and there was none to fill the emptiness of her soul.  Only pains of sorrow, not happiness remained in her remaining days. They lived together for many years to come.  The once upon a time swain never knew the truth and the Queen never knew what she wanted.

She believed, that it was the end of her sufferings. She thought, that with the Swain and his love she would be happy,but the Swain never played flute again and never loved her as much as he loved his poor bride. He was always sad and gloomy, very different from those Swain, which the Queen fell in love with. Gradually happiness of her victory passed away. Nothing could full the emptiness of her soul. Happiness, that she believed to be forever, disappeared! But pain stayed, stayed forever… So they lived together for many years. The Swain never learnt the truth and the Queen never understood, what she really desired.

Wow!  This is the longest essay I corrected so far.  I never do for this length.  However it is extremely riveting that I had no choice but to read and correct to find out the end of the story.  Excellent piece of writing.  I am sure it must be masterful in Russian.  This is my first draft of editing.  I am sure without the correction marks, I can even polish more.  However I refrain as it would not be your work anymore.  I SHALL use this as a link for my essay of "How To Get Most Corrections Out of Your Essay". 

http://www.italki.com/knowledge/page/How%20To%20Get%20Most%20Corrections%20To%20Your%20Essays.htm

This of my top five great essays from non native English speakers.

You are a great weaver of tales!  I was expecting something ordinary.  Your story is fantastic and very original although there are elements of Greek tragic plays and under serious analysis, it was the Devil not God who send this "Rosemary's Baby" to the land!  I look forward to your future stories.