Smoking

Earlier today, I saw a man who was smoking while he was out walking on the street. According to a recent report from JT, the cigarette company, the smoking rate in Japan is 17.9%. The number of people who smoke has been decreasing year by year in Japan.

By comparison, the number of people who smoke is 11.4% in the USA, 24.1% in France, and 20.9% in Germany. I was surprised that the country with the least amount of smokers is Brazil, where the rate is 7.2%. *

I did some research on the reason behind its lower rate. As a result, I think the main reason is that the picture featured on Brazilian cigarette packages is extremely grotesque. The photo they use, especially when compared to the packaging used in other countries, undeniably means that smoking leads to harsh chronic illnesses or death.**

Anyway, I also wanted to say that smoking while out walking around is not only annoying to others nearby, but also inconsiderate to, as well as dangerous for, them due to the effects of second-hand smoke. 

Hi, Ryosuke. Good job! Whatever changes I made were to allow your sentences to sound more natural to my native ears, to complete your thoughts, and for ease of reading. I hope that this helps you. J.

*I would have been interested in knowing the percentage of smokers in China or India, as that would have given me a better sense of proportion with respect to the other countries. For example, maybe it is only at 3% in those two countries, but with their large populations, that is still quite a lot of smokers! In other words, using percentages to make a point in your arguments or statements is good, but only when we can see the entire equation.

**I recently/sadly/reluctantly came back from a vacation in Thailand. Among the things I noticed there, is that on their cigarette packages, they display a smoker’s diseased lung! Definitely not a pretty sight!