My Beautiful Lady!!!

My beautiful lady!!!

Yes, Tijuana is a lady, full of colors and flavors that make drunk  to  everyone who goes through it  (another idea..."that make drunk everyone who is in her company." or "that make drunk everyone who is with her.")  ***, ****   It- She seduces one or the other, preventing it  them from leaving and becoming an unforgettable memory  a  memory without forgetting for those who leave. 
 
My beautiful lady, warm and cold in each bed, sweet and faithful to everyone who wants to create and spend a beautiful evening. *****

Always happy and helpful, my beautiful Tijuana was born with open arms because for her there is no discrimination or fear -- she accepts and loves everyone without comparison.
 
My beautiful lady, with you I want to spend my January mornings, my July afternoons and my winter nights.

 My beautiful Tijuana, in you I want to write my story, found find my memories and create my home.

Because you are my beautiful lady, my Tijuana.

~~~~~~~~~~~

* If you want more information about why "like" is correct instead of "as", you can read this:  http://www.grammar.cl/Notes/Like_vs_As.htm 

**  It could be correct to keep "that" or "which" in those clauses, but then other parts of the sentence would need to change to make the sentence be grammatically correct.   The way you originally wrote it, the first parts are dependent clauses and the reader expects a main clause after "Santa Ana."

***  If you want extra emphasis on the "Yes" another option is to write, "Yes!  Tijuana is a lady,"   You can choose a comma or an explanation point there, but you can never use both a comma and an explanation point together.

****  I think it is best to consistently refer to Tijuana as "she" rather than "it."  This helps to personify the city as a lady rather than as a place or collection of many places.

*****  Normally you would need a main verb in this sentence.  But you have really written a poem, haven't you?  Poems do not have to follow the same rules.  

My beautiful lady...

With you I want to spend my January mornings, my July afternoons and my winter nights.  Good expression!  Since you are presenting this as a poem, a suggestion,

With you, my January mornings spent;

In you, my July afternoons warmed;

And in winter nights cuddled;

 My beautiful Tijuana,

In you I want to write my story written; found

My memories and created,

My home built.

Because you are My beautiful lady, my Tijuana.

Yes! !, Tijuana is a colorful lady, full of colors and filled with flavors that make drunk to intoxicate all who visit her. everyone who goes through it. You are personifying the city to a woman...  Going through a woman make her sounds like a whore.   It You should continue with the personification.  She seduces; she entices; whether one remains with her forever  or not; no one will forget her charms and beauty. the other preventing it from leaving and becomes a memory without forgetting for those who leave.
 
My beautiful lady, warm and cold in each bed. Again wrong choice of expressing.  You make her into a harlot! will welcome you with warmth or non-chalance, depending on her mood.  Not matter what, sweetness and nostalgic faithful to everyone who all wanting s to create and spend a beautiful evening in her presence.

Always happy and helpful, my beautiful Tijuana!, was Born with open arms/graciousness --  because for her there is no discrimination within her; loving all who comes  or fear accepts and loves everyone without comparison. No need to be redundant.