Hello, Hasan! I really enjoyed your writing and agree with much of what you say. There are many things that help create a happy life. For me, it is perspective or how we see the world around us that creates much happiness or sadness. We need to find the beauty in humans, animals, nature, and the events that occur. Also, we need to find activities that make us feel significant, inside or outside of a job. 

I think you are doing a good job in writing, Hasan, and I have made a few corrections below that may help you. There are other ways to make some of these corrections, but I chose these. If you find these tips helpful and would like more, just let me know or schedule a lesson with me. I have been an English teacher for years and I think I could help you out. However, if you choose not to, that is fine and I wish you great success.

Keep up the good effort!

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Can you check my little essay please and bring some comments :)

Do you think that people can only help (be happy) if they have a job they really enjoy?

Most people spend eight hours or more every weekdays (plural form not appropriate here) by working. For this reason, doing what you love to do at work is important, but there are more important factors to be happy. To illustrate , even if someone has a job which he or she doesn't enjoy, (conditional statement needs comma) can be happy with being healthy and having good social life.

People consider their job as a necessity. That means people (who) work do not (do it) because they enjoy (it), but because they have to earn money to survive. Most of my friends have a job they do not like but they are happy because they have friends to enjoy spending their time with. For example, I have a friend whi (who) hate(s) his job but he loves his colleagues. He always spend(s) his time with them after work and he is enjoying his life.

In my opinion, healthiness is (the) most significant factor for happiness. I was not thinking that way before I worked with disabled children. I was always complaining about my life before I met them and their family. If you asked them how (could they) be happy, they definitely would (have) said that I (they) would be happy if I (they) had a normal child, or i (I) would able to do anything to change my (their) child to normal. So, (a) job is not the only factor to be happy.

Overall, even (if) the job you enjoy give(s) some satisfaction, there are far more important factors to be happy. I do not agree that you must have a job you love to be happy.

I wrote this essay down in 40 minutes without using dictionary.

What do you think guys, can you give me some tips?

Can you check my little essay please and bring some comments :)

Do you think that people can only help  happy if they have a job they really enjoy it?

Most people spend eight hours or more every weekdays by working.For this reason, doing what you love to do at work is important, but there are more important factors to be happy. To illustrate , even if someone has a job which he or she doesn't enjoy can be happy with being healthy and having good social life.

People consider their job as a necessity. That means people work do not because they enjoy it, but because they have to earn money to survive. Most of my friends have a job they do not like but they are happy because they have friends to and enjoy spending their time with. For example, I have a friend who hate his job but he loves his colleagues. He always spend his time with them after work and he is enjoying his life.

In my opinion, healthiness is most significant factor for happiness. I was not thinking that way before I worked with disabled children. I was always complaining about my life before I met them and their families. If you asked them how you would be happy, they definitely would said that I would be happy if I had a normal child, or i would able to do anything to change my child to normal. So, job is not the only factor to be happy.

Overall, even the job you enjoy giving you some satisfaction, there are far more important factors to be happy. I do not agree that you must have a job you love to be happy.

I wrote this essay down in 40 minutes without using dictionary.

What do you think guys, can you give me some tips?