Multicultural societies

Many people are concerned about multi-ethnic country bring more benefits for a country. I agree with the view that multicultural societies are more activer and healthier.

First, the culture is just like the a biosphere; different ethnic's cultures can keep maintain a good balance. One country can overcome it's its weaknesses by acquiring other's strong points that the single-ethnic communities can not cannot do.

Moreover, multicultural societies can promote more cultural exchange that fuels economic growth. The different fashion also can develop new focuses of customer spending.

That is not to say multi-ethnic country have no shortcoming. Of course, it may course cause dissensions due to variant different cultural customs. So, we can not jump to a conclusion.

In sum, multicultural societies, which are mixture of different ethnic groups, bring more benefits than drawbacks for a country.

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Another similar version: 

Many people wonder whether having multiple ethnicities is good for a country. I agree with the view that multicultural societies are healthier and more active.

Firstly, a culture is just like a biosphere; different ethnic's cultures can help maintain a healthy balance. One country can overcome its weaknesses by acquiring strengths which other ethnicities offer.

Secondly, multicultural societies can promote cultural exchange that fuels economic growth. For example, different fashion can develop new areas of customer spending.

Of course, multi-ethnic societies also have their shortcomings.  Different cultural customs could result in dissent.  The benefits and weaknesses must both be considered.
 

In conclusion, multicultural societies, which are mixture of different ethnic groups, bring more benefits than drawbacks for a country.

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it's= contraction for "it is"

its = possesive 

(Grammar explanation:  http://www.its-not-its.info )