A Shitty Lousy Morning Need to capitalize all significant words in a title.

I knew it I'm gonna [don't use contractions or slang in a formal essay.  Use it if you are commenting or in private email] that I am going to fall down!

It was raining today. is a raining day, and I was thinking should thought to myself that if I go bicycle to work by bike  or not because I might may fall.  down to the ground, I'm Besides, I am not a good rider and I have to spare needed one hand to hold the umbrella.

But "Heck!  Why shouldn't I give myself a try?" I thought to myself again. I gotta give it a try, "I can will not let the raining stop me. How It is silly!" stupid it is.

At the beginning it first all went pretty good until I met a guy riding motorcycle heading straight towards to me. I was panicked and that's this is how I started my new day with a awkward unlady like fall down.

Now I'm I will listen to myself!  "because of you"

Drats! Shiiiiiit! [Try not to use such expletives in your essays.  I treat all essays as formal entities.  There are some exceptions but this one is not]

I'll have a go too. :)  Still, please pay attention to Jeff's and Rudi's corrections and commments.

I'll try to keep the level of language you aimed at, but please remember: if you use slang and bad language, the listener has a very good reason to not care about your problems. That's simply how bad language comes across to native speakers: bad.

Colloquial expression is very difficult - you can't get this from a book or a website. You have to live it.

My Shitty Morning

I knew it I'm was gonna fall down!

Today's a rainy day, so I was thinking should I tossing up over going to work by bike or not because I thought I'd have a spill if I fell. fall down to the ground, I'm not a good a hopeless rider even when I don't have to and I have to spare one hand hold an umbrella.

Anyway, I thought I oughta give it a try. I can't not let some stupid raining stop me. How stupid it is.

At the beginning First off it was going pretty OK until I was heading straight towards a guy ride on a motorbike coming straight towards to me. I was panicked and that's how I started my new day with a spill awkward fall down.

Now I'm listening to "Because Of You".

I can't tell if this is deliberate, or if you heard the song by coincidence.

Shiiiiiit!

Looking back, I think the other problem was that sometimes your words and grammar were not colloquial enough.  You were trying to sound casual, but the result was even more artificial.  Try sticking with the standard English and getting that absolutely perfect first.

>>Unlike Jeff, I don't see this as a "formal" essay. It's your "notebook" -- a casual journal where you can practice your writing, especially idiomatic wording that is so difficult to learn. I like the "conversational" tone, so I will try to preserve that tone, and your construction as much as possible. If you throw in a mild profanity here and there, so what? It's an honest expression of your thoughts and feelings at the time. I think, when you hit the street, you really did scream out, “妈的！”  One thing I do prefer, however, is to avoid text message shortcuts, such as "gonna", "wanna", "u", etc.  And while I pay attention to proper use of commas and periods, I think the use of dashes (--) and elipses (...) can help to achieve those conversational pauses. My changes to your wording appear in italics.<<

Shitty morning

I knew it. I'm going to fall down!
Today is a rainy day. I was thinking, should I go to work by bike or not, because I might fall down to the ground. I'm not a good rider and I would have to use one hand to hold my umbrella.
But I thought, I've got to give it a try. I cannot let the rain stop me. How stupid that was.
At the beginning it went pretty well ... until I met a guy riding a motorcycle straight towards to me. I was in a panic and that's how I started my new day -- with an awkward fall. [ ... or maybe "an awkward crash to the street!" ]

Now I'm listening to "Because of You".
Shiiiiiit!  ["Sheee-at!" might be closer to how this exclamation is often spoken.]

Shit Morning

I knew it I'm that I was gonna going to fall down!

Today It is a was raining day today and I was thinking about whether or not I should I go to work by ride my bike to work or not because there was a possibility that I might fall down to the ground due to the weather. I'm not a good rider at riding bikes and I have to spare need one hand to hold an/my umbrella.

But I thought to myself,  "I've got to give it a try" I can and not let raining rain stop me from going. How stupid it is silly of me.

At the beginning first, it went was going pretty good well until I met came across a guy riding his motorcycle straight towards to me. I was panicked and fell. That's how I started my new day, with an awkward embarrassing fall down.

Now I'm listening "because of you" (不肯定这个句子是什么意思。 你在听一首叫《because of you》的歌曲吗? 如果是这样的， 把那个句子改成 "Now I'm listening to the song 《Because Of You》或者 "Now I'm listening to 《Because Of You》 by 什么什么)
Shit!

希望我的纠正对你有帮助！