Hello,I'd really appreciate it if anyone could correct my usage of words and ways to improve
Why should people stop smoking?
People should make vigorous efforts to stop smoking due to the facts that smoking has several damages in their lives. Money that people squander on cigarettes is rather to be spent on things that are more valid and useful. Moreover, both smokers and everyone sitting next to them are most likely to have severe damages, smoking people are risking getting cancer and many lethal diseases, and everyone who has to go through this ordeal by inhaling the smoke has the same chances to get these illnesses. In addition, smokers are notorious in some societies, which makes it difficult for them to commune with others because of this demeanor. In conclusion, to avoid all the risks and consequences, smokers have to quit smoking.
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Hello, I'd really appreciate it if anyone could correct my usage of words and ways to improve
Why should people stop smoking?
People should make vigorous efforts a concerted effort to stop smoking due to the facts that smoking negatively impacts people's lives in several ways. has several damages in their lives.
Money that people squander on cigarettes is rather to be spent could instead be spent on things that are more valid and useful. Moreover, both smokers and everyone sitting next to them are most likely to have severe health consequences damages . smoking people Smokers are risking getting cancer and many other lethal diseases, and everyone who has to go through this ordeal by around them also inhaling the smoke has the same chances to get of getting these illnesses.
[I removed "to go through this ordeal" because it does not quite work. An ordeal is usually a single event, but inhaling smoke and eventually getting ill is a longer term process. You could say: Anyone unlucky enough to be around inhaling smoke... / Everyone in the vicinity of the smoker also ...]
In addition, smokers are notorious perceived in a negative light in some societies, which makes it difficult for them to commune interact with others / get along in society because of this demeanour this negative image associated with smoking. [I removed notorious - this word is usually for infamous people, such as famous criminals, not so good for smokers. / I also removed "commune" - this word is a bit rare, I have heard the phrase "to commune with nature", but rarely elsewhere is it used.]
In conclusion, to avoid all the risks and consequences, smokers have to quit smoking.
Nice work!
A few final things ...
One makes an effort (not: to make efforts)
Due to the fact (not: due to the facts) - One exception could be, "Due to the facts at hand / of the case...", but more normally "Due to the fact that..." (i.e. a single thing)
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