Can someone help me with my writing?
Although some people believe that certain subjects such as history and literature are deemed necessary, whereas other ones such as science and mathematics are considered less essential, I completely disagree because all four subjects mentioned have an important role for students.

First of all, History provides information related to people's culture and background. It is crucial to know facts related to the past in order to create a connection with the country's roots. Moreover, it is a common belief that learning about past prevents individuals to repeat the same mistakes. All in all, History is a valuable subject that creates a link between people's past and their future.

Question

Can someone help me with my writing?
Although some people believe that certain subjects such as history and literature are deemed necessary, whereas other ones  such as science and mathematics are considered less essential, I completely disagree because all four subjects mentioned have an important role for students.

First of all, History provides information related to people's culture and background. It is crucial to know facts related to the past in order to create a connection with the country's roots. Moreover, it is a common belief that learning about past prevents individuals to repeat the same mistakes. All in all, History is a valuable subject that creates a link between people's past and their future.

Answer

learning about past prevents individuals to repeat the same mistakes.  this part has mistakes I corrected it below.

learning about the past prevents individuals repeating the same mistakes.

Answer

This is good English and shows correct use of many transitional phrases

"History" should not be capitalized. Subjects of study should not generally be capitalized unless they are the names of languages, which are.

In the sentence "Although some people believe ..., whereas other ones ..." these two clauses should have parallel subjects, which means the second should not be written with the passive voice "are considered". This construction with "whereas" contrasts the subjects, so "ones" seems to refer to some other people rather than some other subjects. Perhaps a better way to write this would be: "Although some people believe ..., while considering other ones ... less essential".

Answer

You never need help because you are familiar with the situation from all sides and I stand by you and encourage this spirit

Answers · 3

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