How CAN you? How is it POSSIBLE that...? "Could" is used to express possibility. Using the phrase "how could you", you are asking how it is possible for a human being to do such a thing. It is true: could is the past tense verb of can, but we also use it to speak generally in the present tense. The clue to this is in the second half of the sentence where it states that the daughter "can't take care of herself". This is the present tense. Presently and in the immediate future, the daughter can not take care of herself and so abandoning her would be the worst thing for a parent to do. In general, how does someone have it in their heart to do that to their own child? #2 in your attempted answer is correct but it is important to note the use of "could" to take about possibility. The sentence you have given asks how it could be possible for a person to abandon their daughter. It implies that this situation is crazy or immoral and that the speaker can not imagine themselves making the same choice or deciding on the same action (abandoning the daughter).

Could can imply either, depending on the context, and the structure around it. "How could you..." sounds like it is referring to something that has already happened in the past. "You could abandon..." would sound more like a hypothetical question.

Thanks Sean!

"How can you...." would be better in your sentence. I think