Is this writing correct ? This is a discription of an art work Thank you
Is this writing have any problem with grammar? And as this writing is formal and for academic purpose, I would appreciate if some body changes the vocabularies for more formal ones if any? Thank you

As you come near to his work, you will be receiving a lasting peace, then you will experience a wonderful feeling which you just have when you step into the heart of classical persian miniatures. The feeling is like you put your feet on the surface of clear water you have developed in your mind. The water that objects can be seen easily through. This is a characteristics that he was looking for after intensive study on water and lines.
The situation that lines- the visual elements- has leading us to water one of the four basic elements of earth which is vital for living thing.

Question

Is this writing correct ? This is a discription of an art work Thank you
Is this writing have any problem with grammar? And as this writing is formal and for academic purpose, I would appreciate if some body changes the vocabularies for more formal ones if any? Thank you
 
As you come near to his work, you will be receiving a lasting peace, then you will experience a wonderful feeling which you just have when you step into the heart of classical persian miniatures. The feeling is like you put your feet on the surface of clear water you have developed in your mind. The water that objects can be seen easily through.  This is a characteristics that he was looking for after intensive study on water and lines.
The situation that lines- the visual elements- has leading us to water  one of the four basic elements of earth which is vital for living thing.

Answer

As you come near his work you will  receive lasting peace.  You will experience a wonderful feeling when you step into the heart of classical Persian miniatures. The feeling is like putting your feet on the surface of clear water that you have developed in your mind. The water that objects (projects?) can easily be seen through. This is a characteristic that he was looking for after intensive study on water and lines.
The situation that lines- the visual elements- has led us to water, one of the four basic elements of earth, which is vital for living things.

Hope this helps you Nasim :)

Answers · 1

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