I am in instant need of help
I need your help ,there is some answers to a application from my future unniversity,so i have to reply.so there is my replies,i wish there is someone can modify my answer~I really appreciate your help!

First of all, I majored in Investments that belongs to economic discipline, having a global vision is very important for me. Next, South Korea is an economically developed countries in East Asia, there are well-developed education, especially in economics. Lastly China and South Korea share a similar culture, it will be a fascinating process to enjoy the school life in different country and benefit my whole life. However, this chance is never should be missed, so I applying for Global Korean Scholarship.

Question

I am in instant need of help
I need your help ,there is some answers to a application from my future unniversity,so i have to reply.so there is my replies,i wish there is someone can modify my answer~I really appreciate your help!

First of all, I majored in Investments that belongs to economic discipline, having a global vision is very important for me. Next, South Korea is an economically developed countries in East Asia, there are well-developed education, especially in economics. Lastly China and South Korea share a similar culture, it will be a fascinating process to enjoy the school life in different country and benefit my whole life. However, this chance is never should be missed, so I applying for Global Korean Scholarship.

Answer

Correction:
First of all, I  have an Economics degree from......... University and majored in Investments. 
 Having a global vision is very important for me, because South Korea is economically, a  well developed  Asian country. It  also has an excellent education system, especially in the field of  Economics.
 Lastly, China and South Korea share a similar culture, so it will be a fascinating process to enjoy an academic life in a  different country which will extend  my whole  outlook on  life.  I  welcome the chance to broaden my horizons,  that is why,  I am applying for a Global Korean Scholarship.

Answers · 1

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