Hey guys! Could you help me to correct that?
A highly motivated and organized individual looking to work in tandem with a team in a professional and challenging environment where I could improve my entrepreneurial potentials and see myself utilizing my leadership skills and qualification to the needs and culture of the organization.
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Answers · 3
1
It is generally very good. I have two points/questions though.
You started with 'A', rather than "I am a". Did you do that for a reason? As it is, it sounds like a bullet point, rather than a sentence. It also wasn't until I got 1/2 way through the sentence that I realised the missing part was 'I am', rather than 'we are looking for'.
You used 'qualification' in the singular. Do you really only have one?
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