Formality level to congratulate a close friend on their wedding engagement?
My best friend just got engaged, and I would like to send them a nice note. I'm trying to figure out the appropriate level of formality for the conjugation. I know the lowest 해체 form is often used between close friends, but will that convey the appropriate level of respectful courtesy for a wedding engagement? On the other hand if I go too formal will that not convey that we are close friends?

Is this my best option?
약혼을 축하 드려요 !

This one seems very casual. Is it too informal?
약혼을 축하해 !

I've seen two different version of the verbs, one of which I believe is the honorific 드리다 form. They look something like this. Should I use the second version to add a little pomp?
축하하 (다)
축하드리(다)

Is it possible to use some sort of combination of the honorific second verb version with the informal tense? Like this if it makes any sense:
약혼을 축하 드려 !

I'm new to Korean (basically just learned the alphabet), so this question might not make a lot of sense. Thanks for any advice!

Question

Formality level to congratulate a close friend on their wedding engagement?
My best friend just got engaged, and I would like to send them a nice note.   I'm trying to figure out the appropriate level of formality for the conjugation.  I know the lowest 해체 form is often used between close friends, but will that convey the appropriate level of respectful courtesy for a wedding engagement?   On the other hand if I go too formal will that not convey that we are close friends?

Is this my best option?
약혼을 축하 드려요 !

This one seems very casual. Is it too informal?
약혼을 축하해 !

I've seen two different version of the verbs, one of which I believe is the honorific 드리다 form.  They look something like this.  Should I use the second version to add a little pomp?
축하하 (다)
축하드리(다)

Is it possible to use some sort of combination of the honorific second verb version with the informal tense? Like this if it makes any sense:
약혼을 축하 드려 !

I'm new to Korean (basically just learned the alphabet), so this question might not make a lot of sense.  Thanks for any advice!

Answer

I think you should follow your normal way of interacting wit the person.  If you have known the person, you must have communicated with them - which is probably the plain style as you said "best friend".
You can use the same style of speech or correspondence you've used with them before.

Using polite style like 드리다 doesn't really add more to what you're saying.  If anything, it probably will put more distance between the two people.  So I would advise against using it to sound more sincerely.  You could add adverbs like 진심으로 (sincerely), etc.

Also note that honorific words like 드리다 sound strange if used with the plain style.

For example:
- 약혼을 축햐해! = Fine between friends both in speech and writing.
- 약혼을 축하드려요! = Good for someone who is not a close friend.

- 약혼을 축하드려! = BAD.  드리다 and the informal ending sounds very strange.

Answer

In Korean, among intimate friends, we use 반말 which means informal plain. However, the age is important. If your friend is older than you 약혼(을) 축하드려요 is natural. But if the friend is younger than you or the same age, 약혼(을) 축하해 is more natural. Of course we use 반말 with older intimate friends. But if you use 반말 with the friend, you need some kind of agreement  to use 반말. 
And 드리다 is honorific expression for 주다
You can use the expression like this ways,
축하드립니다 or 축하드려요
We normally don't say 축하드려 which could look sarcastic.

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Answers · 2

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