English vocab help
Hello all. My native language is English however I need help from someone that understands English grammar/vocabulary better. Does the following sentence make sense?

Full sentence:
'No Sugar' doesn't celebrate the resilience of the Munday/Millimurra family, it highlights their impoverished dehumanisation and their resilence towards it.

The part that I'm not sure on is below

It highlights their impoverised dehumanisation and their resilence towards it.

Thanks :)

Question

English vocab help
Hello all. My native language is English however I need help from someone that understands English grammar/vocabulary better. Does the following sentence make sense?

Full sentence: 
'No Sugar' doesn't celebrate the resilience of the Munday/Millimurra family, it highlights their impoverished dehumanisation and their resilence towards it.

The part that I'm not sure on is below

It highlights their impoverised dehumanisation and their resilence towards it.

Thanks :)

Answer

I think using resilience twice in the same sentence sounds a little awkward. Also, when you say "resilience towards it" - what is the it? is it the their resilience or their dehumanisation?
Perhaps something like this instead?

'No Sugar' doesn't celebrate the resilience of the Munday/Millimurra family. Instead, by highlighting their impoverished state, it dehumanises them while emphasizing their fortitude.

Hope this helps.

Answers · 2

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