How can I do (not sure what this means. maybe "How do I say this?")

You have a couple possibilities here:

Don't give me a fish. Teach me to fish!

You wouldn't use "the" unless you were literally talking about a specific fish that they were giving you, but I think you are intending this metaphorically, like from "Give a man a fish, and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and you feed him for a lifetime."