Search from various English teachers...
Russia flagYana Vishnyakova
Your corrections needed :) Every time I’m asked about the most surreal experience I’ve had, I hark back to the night I spent on lake Baikal. By that time I had been backpacking for several years, but never had I ever traveled solo. So one day I thought it was high time to prove myself I could be independent. I chose my destination - the deepest lake in the world - I found all the necessary equipment and set off. Well, at least that was what I thought I did.

In fact, being just an ordinary city dweller with little experience, I didn’t take into consideration some details. The first and most important one was the climate. It was March, and normally the temperature hovers around -15 during the day and falls below -20 at night at this time. That year wasn’t an exception, but I decided to continue at my peril. The situation was exacerbated by the fact that my tent wasn’t designed for such extreme temperatures.

I remember lying there, gripped by fear and frozen to the bone. Every time I heard a noise, I grabbed a knife as my imagination depicted various scenarios of my death. I couldn’t fall asleep. I was cursing the day I decided bravery was one of the greatest human virtues.

Strange as it may seem, I survived! The next morning, on my way to the nearest village, I felt I was the happiest person alive.

Corrections · 6

2

Note: L. Bee and rezaa are well-intentioned, but your English is better than theirs.  Great work!  I can only dream of becoming as proficient in my second and third languages as you are in English.

red=mistakes that need to be corrected

blue= sounds better

yellow=my comments

Your corrections needed :)

Every time I’m asked about the most surreal experience I’ve had, I hark back to the night I spent on Lake Baikal. By that time I had already been backpacking for several years, but never had I ever traveled solo. So one day I thought it was high time to prove to myself that I could be independent. OR: to prove myself independent (factive structure) I chose my destination - the deepest lake in the world - I found all the necessary equipment and set off. Well, at least that was what I thought I did had done.

In fact, being just an ordinary city dweller with little experience, I didn’t take some details into consideration some details. The first and most important one was the climate. It was March, and normally the temperature hovers around -15 during the day and falls below -20 at night at this time. That year wasn’t an exception, but I decided to continue at my peril. The situation was exacerbated by the fact that my tent wasn’t designed for such extreme temperatures.

I remember lying there, gripped by fear and frozen to the bone. Every time I heard a noise, I grabbed a knife as my imagination depicted various scenarios of involving my death. I couldn’t fall asleep. I was cursing the day I decided bravery was one of the greatest human virtues.

Strange as it may seem, I survived! The next morning, on my way to the nearest village, I felt I was the happiest person alive.

1
Every time I’m asked about the most surreal experience I’ve had, I get back to the night spending spent on lake Baikal. By that time, although I had been backpacking for several years, i had never travelled lonely. So one day I thought it was the best time which i could prove myself and I could be independent. I chose my destination - the deepest lake in the world - I found all the necessary equipments and set off. Well, at least that was what I thought I did.

In fact, being just an ordinary city dweller with little experience, I didn’t take into consideration some details. The first and most important one was the climate. It was March, and normally the temperature hovers around -15 during the day and falls below -20 at night at this time. That year wasn’t an exception, but I decided to continue at my ?!?!. The situation was exacerbated by the fact that my tent wasn’t designed for such extreme temperatures.

I remember lying there, gripping by fear and the cold pentrated into my bones. Every time I heard a noise, I grabbed a knife as my imagination depicted various scenarios of my death. I couldn’t fall asleep. I was cursing the day that I decided bravery was one of the greatest human virtues.

Strange as it may seem, I survived! The next morning, on my way to the nearest village, I felt that I was the happiest person alive.

0

Your corrections needed :)

Every time I’m asked about the most surreal experience I’ve had, I hark back to the night I spent on Lake Baikal. By that time I had been backpacking for several years, but never had I ever traveled solo. So one day I thought it was high time to prove to myself I could be independent. I chose my destination - the deepest lake in the world - I found all the necessary equipment and set off. Well, at least that was what I thought I did.

In fact, being just an ordinary city dweller with little experience, I didn’t take into consideration some details. The first and most important one was the climate. It was March, and normally the temperature hovers around -15 during the day and falls below -20 at night at this time. That year wasn’t an exception, but I decided to continue at my peril. The situation was exacerbated by the fact that my tent wasn’t designed for such extreme temperatures.

I remember lying there, gripped by fear and frozen to the bone. Every time I heard a noise, I grabbed a knife as my imagination depicted various scenarios of my death. I couldn’t fall asleep. I was cursing the day I decided bravery was one of the greatest human virtues.

Strange as it may seem, I survived! The next morning, on my way to the nearest village, I felt I was the happiest person alive.

0
The way you write said a lot about the way you think.Maybe you do an effort,and r trying to make something out of it,but somehow is far away from anyone's way of speaking.Please try to read as many books as u can in order to form the basic structure of the sentence.First see the grammar rules,and try to understand them.That is how you will realize why is so important not to remember them all all of the sudden,and to memorize phrases,and u will finally understand that sometimes people just speak,or don't speak that way..if is too difficult for you to understand it just try to memorize as many expressions as u can by heart..Is like u hear them talking that way,so u will try to talk that way too..Good luck,and I'm here for u always,but correcting your work just doesn't make any sense to me,but writing completely a new story would be totally awesome..

Want to progress faster?

Join this learning community and try out free exercises!

Don’t miss out on the opportunity to learn a language from the comfort of your own home. Browse our selection of experienced language tutors and enroll in your first lesson now!

Start Learning Today