My script for a lesson in debating*

This is my script about Japanese high-school students working part-time jobs.

My side is "Negative". Can you check and correct my English? 

We think high-school students shouldn’t work a part-time job. Our first point is time. 

A survey conducted by the National Institution for Youth Education said that about half of high-school students who have experience of in part-time jobs have zero study time at home, without part-time work experience, zero is less than 30%**. If they do a part-time job, they will lose study time clearly clearly lose study time.

Our second point is risk. There is a serious problem that high-school students who work a part-time job take an over-the-top prank photo of them that themselves while working and give the photo to SNS, especially Twitter.*** For example, a school girl who worked at Pizza-la entered climbed into the refrigerator, took a photo and gave them to shared them on Twitter. Because high-school students are still children, there is the risk of giving disadvantage to a risk of disadvantaging the company.****

　In conclusion, it is most important for high-school students to study. In addition, working is still early for high school students it is still early for them to work.***** So, high-school students should do other things such as study and club activities rather than work part-time jobs.

* Here "a lesson in debating" or "debating class"  (without the "a") are both correct. Lesson usually refers to one time only, class is multiple lessons over time, or a subject.

** Unfortunately, this doesn't make much sense. Try to reword it.

*** Try rewording this. I think "share" would be more suitable here than "give". You can give a photo to a person but not to a website (＝シェアすると同じ使い方）. "Especially" sounds odd here, and it makes it sound like Twitter is a high-school student. You could try something like "[...] and share the photos on SNS and Twitter, which is especially bad/problematic."

**** You would generally use "disadvantaging" if the company was in a competition (which it technically is, as it competes with other companies, hence why I left the wording as it is), but it's more natural to use "a risk of damaging the reputation of the company".

***** What you wrote is also correct, but it is more natural this way. It's also fine in English to omit the obvious sometimes (here: high-school students).

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Very nice! You did a great job, your English is very good, and I'm sure you'll get even better over time. Try to practice articles (= a/an/the) a bit more! I hope everything goes well! :)

My script for debate lesson