May 18th
I went to the Alcatraz island last Friday. At first, before going there, I wondered why no one could swim from the island to San Francisco. After looking the sea stream and the distance, I felt that I could not swim out in alive if I was prison-breaker. The sight seeing from the island was very beautiful. The contrast between the blue sky and the ocean was very exciting, and buildings and towers seemed to be build on the sea. In the contrast, inside of the prison was very dark and dirty. I thought that the prisoner desired to be released if they looked the beautiful scene.
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Corrections · 4
1
May 18th
I went to the Alcatraz island last Friday. At first, before going there, I wondered why no one could swim from the island to San Francisco. After looking at the sea stream (not sure what you mean by "sea stream" - maybe the "current," "waves," or "surf"?) and the distance, I felt that I could not swim out in alive if I was prison-breaker (would not be able to swim out alive if I was an escaping prisoner). The sightseeing from the island was very beautiful. The contrast between the blue sky and the ocean was very exciting ("striking," maybe?), and the buildings and towers seemed to be build built on the sea. In the contrast, the inside of the prison was very dark and dirty. I thought that the prisoner desired to be released if they looked the beautiful scene. I thought that the prisoners must have longed to be free when looking at such a beautiful scene. (My suggestion to make this last sentence sound more natural)Nice work!
1
May 18th
I went to Alcatraz Island last Friday. At first, before going there, I wondered why no one could swim from the island to San Francisco. After looking at the sea stream and the distance, I felt that I could not swim out alive if I was a prison-breaker. The sightseeing from the island was very beautiful. The contrast between the blue sky and the ocean was very exciting, and the buildings and towers seemed to be built on the sea. In the contrast, inside of the prison was very dark and dirty. I thought that the prisoners desired to be released when they looked at this beautiful scene.Want to progress faster?
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